... in bed.

Trying on hats

2011-10-21T10:00:00.000-07:00

I've always wished I were a dominatrix. I think I'd love the power of ordering someone around, having him/her get satisfaction from pleasing and serving me. I fantasize about being a dominatrix with a really hot submissive man who worships me. I imagine having him feed me, shave me, tying him up and teasing/torturing him in some way that makes eventual the eventual climax that much better. The power sounds delicious in theory. I even think it'd be great to go by Mistress Lexi. But it's just not me.
Whenever I've actually been placed in the dom role I end up worrying I'm actually hurting the guy, wishing he'd just tell me what to do or not being patient enough to tease him to the breaking point.
I'm good at being a sub though. I've been embracing this more and more recently. I think it took me a long time to realize that some degree of S&M are present in most relationships, inside the limits of what the individuals define as "safe, sane and consensual" (cornerstones of the practice). Realizing that power dynamics are natural in a relationship and accepting that I'm a bottom (sub) really helped me to embrace and enjoy that role.
I used that think being a sub meant doing demeaning things. Now I know just where to set my boundaries and discuss it beforehand with any partner. I am finding that I happily serve and obey my master in sexual play when I'm comfortable. In the right situation it is highly enjoyable to be tied up, blindfolded, spanked, teased, objectified or leashed. I am happy to give up control when I'm sure that my partner won't abuse it. In relinquishing of control and experiencing good pain, anticipation builds and I find myself aroused and satisfied.

What's sexy

2011-10-17T21:53:00.000-07:00

I frequently wonder what makes something sexy. I find that each of my senses has the ability to detect sexy. And the stimuli can change depending on my mood or the environment. When something is sexually appealing my heart flutters and my breath gets caught in my throat for a moment, sometimes I feel lightheaded and other times I just smile.
One of the more recent sexy things I encountered was a woman's skin. This particular woman has the most amazingly soft skin - as smooth as butter or silk, with no imperfections to be found. Is she real? I think so. I spent a whole evening kissing her. The crazy thing is that I was at a sex club and instead of finding men to play with (I identify as a 1 on the Kinsey Scale) I only made out with her. But she was what appealed to my senses on that night. Kissing her was heaven - ridiculously soft lips, great tasting and flirty. Caressing her body and enjoying the connection was all I really wanted to do.
I had met her once before, but previously she had played more with my husband and I with her boyfriend. I believe this is because we fell into the traditional roles of straight couples at a sex club. But at our second encounter, her boyfriend was away for the weekend so I wasn't distracted by him. And thank goodness. The gentle play between our two bodies felt sweet and uncomplicated. We were comfortable and aroused. But since we are both straight women our sexual tension never reached the level where we wanted to devour each other with passion or wondered whether this would become something more.
I wish that I weren't so fickle when it comes to what I define as sexy. One day someone or something can be neutral in my mind and then suddenly a switch will flip and I'll be extremely turned on by whatever my brain or body has deemed desirous. It might be lips one day, muscles, hair, a laugh, or conversation another day. There's definitely a pattern to what I find appealing but there are also the outliers that give me an unexpected warm and tingly feeling. It's likely the outliers that lift my mood the most and invigorate me. Those experiences remind me of my teenage years. Sadly, they seem to disappear as people pair up and mate for life. In part, my ability to act upon some of these wild and crazy passionate feelings helps keep me so happy to be in my semi-open marriage.
The only guarantee I have is that I'll experience something sensually enjoyable in every day. And I find it pretty awesome that my senses are able to give me that much pleasure and titillation. I just wish I knew what would delight me each time so I could seek it out. But then I think part of the excitement is the surprise.

Friend

2011-05-28T14:04:00.000-07:00

I saw the beautiful Je Joue Ami while shopping at Good Vibrations and could not resist taking it home with me. I have to admit that I'm a bit of an exercise fanatic and perhaps that's in part why a vaginal toning device appeals to me. Having something that encourages me to exercise my pubococcygeus muscles is good motivation to actually do the work that leads to more enjoyable sex, stronger orgasms, and decreased incontinence.
I had never heard of the company Je Joue but am now thoroughly impressed with them, based on this product and touching their others at the store. They are new to the sex toy scene, having started with their first high end vibrator in 2008. The Ami, along with their 3 other offerings are all beautifully packaged, wonderfully luxurious feeling toys made from body safe silicone and ABS plastic. They are phthalate and latex free and designed with careful precision.
I love how each of the "exercisers" is carefully crafted to make this a successful incremental exercise program. The Ami 1 (1.65 ounces, 1.5" in diameter) is a single lightweight ball. It is the largest of the three and the easiest to keep in during Kegals (or housework for a more ambitious and multi-tasking approach). The Ami 2 and 3 are double ball toners that progress in weight while decreasing in size (2.75 ounces, 1.25" in diameter and 3" long, and 3.73 ounces, 1" in diameter and 2.75" long, respectively). The balls inside the silicone casing move slightly, making for a very mild teasing "jingling" sensation if you move around while exercising. I do wish the movement of the balls were more intense (perhaps smaller balls to allow for more movement) as it's not actually that noticeable or arousing.
There are countless ways to use these balls. The most basic is to just do Kegals while they are inserted. But each one also has a cord attached for simple removal, or resistance training. A change in position or keeping them in during your day can also increase the challenge.
With few drops of lubricant on the Ami, I find that it's both easier to put in and provides more of a workout, since it has an easier time slipping out. I personally found the Ami 1 to be too large and light to be much in the way of exercise, though it does feel pretty good inside. I find that I prefer the Ami 2 most of the time since it's heavier, and but still somewhat girthy which is pleasurable, while remaining a challenge. The Ami 3 and I are just getting to be friends - at times I still find it frustrating (and muscularly fatiguing) to use for more than a few minutes at a time.
I recently asked my husband if he could feel the results of my 2-3 times a week of vaginal workouts. He gave me an uncertain look and said that sex recently had felt really good. But, whether or not he's feeling the difference, I can certainly tell that the increased intensity of my PC muscle contractions during orgasm are providing me with more pleasure.

Paint, lick and repeat

2011-05-19T21:46:00.000-07:00

The box of Kama Sutra Lover's Body Paint from Bliss Connection sat on my dresser for a long while. I looked at the jar of milk chocolate and the little included paint brush, thinking that there wouldn't be any way this product would do anything for me and my sex-life. My husband and I finally tried it a few weeks ago, quickly realizing that I had been mistaken. Surely it was no orgasm in a box, but wherever my husband or I put it on each other we were guaranteed to do a thorough job licking, sucking or kissing it off. The tender ritual that the use of this edible and delicious body paint created was quite enjoyable.

We started by placing the paint on breasts, necks, fingers and stomachs. We were both smiling and laughing throughout. After about 15 minutes I came to the realization that we were genuinely having fun, no longer just testing out the body paint because I felt obliged. And who wouldn't have fun when chocolate and loving caresses are combined. In fact it seems like the perfect addition to any truth or dare game. Anyone wanna host a game? I'll provide the body paint :)

The only downsides I found with regard to this product were that the chocolate is very thick, so when I tried to make specific designs with it, I was left a bit frustrated. But I know that's not it's main purpose so I'll forgive this flaw. The other problem is that we were left a bit sticky even if it was licked completely off, so a shower afterwards is essential. Luckily showers are a great opportunity for continued passionate adventures - the only thing I need now is more time in which to have these romantic encounters. Good thing I have this product staring me down and begging me to toss aside the tedium of everyday life and use it.

Cock whenever I want it

2011-04-03T22:14:00.000-07:00

My newest toy lets me to get fucked practically anywhere. It sticks to most surfaces, allowing for versatility in position. I'm talking about the Basix 7.5 inch Suction Cup Dong from Pipedream. Bliss Connection sent me this toy which I now affectionately refer to as Mr. Black.
This phthalate and latex-free, rubber toy is made in the USA. The insertable part is 7.5 inches, but the toy is actually 8 inches all told since it contains the base of the penis with balls and a suction cup. It is very thick at the head and tapers down a bit toward the base, allowing for maximal stimulation with penetration. It was a little stinky when I pulled it from its functional but un-aesthetically pleasing packaging. Thankfully, I was able to quickly wash away the smell by bathing it for a few minutes. Which is a good strategy for getting rid of the smell on any man's junk, right?
With a jelly-like texture, this toy feels and looks fairly lifelike which is both a turn-on and a little creepy. The fact that it's a floating penis allows me to shut my eyes and fantasize about the guy it could be attached to, while not actually cheating on my husband or risking disease or pregnancy. At the same time I might just as well have toys that don't look like dismembered body parts. Also, if this were a real penis I were to have sex with, I'd hope it were a bit more perky. I find that unless it's well lubricated, the penetration doesn't go so smoothly because it's slightly flaccid. Also, what's up with the word dong? I hate it - cock, dildo, and phallus are all much better options. Dong just sounds goofy. Think Long Duck Dong.
Aside from those complaints I have had some fun times. I like how I can stick it to the bed-frame, shower wall, door, or floor and be the one in control. I can do doggystyle, sitting, standing or lying down, depending on my mood. I can start and stop when I want, taking pauses for clitoral stimulation with other toys while keeping this dong inside, without it going completely limp. Using this girthy toy on the inside while achieving a blended orgasm (clitoral stimulation simultaneously) pleases me in an intense way. While having sex I usually have a hard time keeping my clitoral toys in the right place to maintain the thrusting or movement that pleases my husband. With this toy it's all about my needs while somehow still feeling more like the real deal than just a toy.
It is harness attachable so I could use it as a strap-on, though probably only vaginally because of it's girth. I'll let you know how it goes if that situation arises. For now I'll keep using it on myself, pretending I'm banging Denzel Washington, and wishing he were just slightly more turned on by our relations.

Tricks of the trade

2011-03-13T23:16:00.000-07:00

Unfortunately, I wouldn't call myself a penis pleasing goddess. I do know a thing or two and enjoy playing around and seeing what makes different guys moan, but all my learning, up until now, has been based on real life penis-ing. I'm not saying that can't get the job done, but there's not a whole lot of variation in what I do.
A few months ago I purchased the book Tickle His Pickle by Dr. Sadie Allison. It's touted as the how to guide for penis pleasing, both for oral sex and hand jobs. The first time I heard this book mentioned in conversation, I didn't think much of it. I had never had a problem making guys cum - it always happened one way or another.
But when a friend of mine purchased Tickle His Pickle and a few weeks later told me that her boyfriend (not one to hand out compliments easily) said she'd given the best blow job he'd ever received, I decided I just might need the book after all. My friend's boyfriend hadn't even known she'd purchased such a book, and had always previously said an ex-girlfriend gave far superior head. I know you may think that's harsh, but that's just how honest he is.
After reading through this fairly short (144 page) book, I am proud to say that I learned several new techniques. Not only is the book clear and concise (there are drawings to go along with the text) but Dr. Allison does not shy away from any topics either, she's as up front and direct talking about anal play, safe sex practices, odors and lube as she is with ways to be sensual and techniques for providing mind blowing orgasms. And while a book by a woman about penis pleasing may seem counterintuitive, she clearly states that she got help and advise from men. She also repeatedly mentions that while the tips and techniques may bring new excitement and orgasmic bliss to the man, none of it will happen without good communication and setting the mood as a foundation.
The one other great thing this book provides is humor. Dr. Allison makes it clear that while giving a man physical pleasure is a serious topic in terms of forming or maintaining a sexual relationship, it's also something that is natural, fun and funny at times. The humor makes it both an easy read and leaves you feeling less like you've just been taught the one official way to please your man - after all, each man is unique and this book just gives lots of options, some of which will probably be for now and others that may be for another time or another man.
I'm planning to continue work on my deep throating technique now that I know laying back over the bed works best. Also, I'm going talk dirty more of the time and use my natural oral sex lubricant (saliva) much more freely - especially since I was made with way more than my fair share of the world's saliva resources.

A dust anyone can love

2011-03-05T23:10:00.000-08:00

Well I have a dust allergy, so typically I stay as far away from any type of dust as possible. The Kama Sutra Honey Dust however breaks this rule. I find myself reevaluating the name "Honey Dust," and want to call it "Honey Powder," which sounds more refined to me anyway. This product is a sensual powder to put on skin for a nice smell as well as for removing with the mouth during sexual play.
I purchased this product from Bliss Connection after trying it at a Pleasure Party I hosted. I love the way I can lightly apply it and smell sweet for hours. It's made from real spun honey and corn starch so I was happy to know that what I was putting on my skin was natural. Is it sticky, you ask. Nope. In large quantities maybe, but if you apply a light dusting of it with the real rooster feather applicator that is included, it just smells and tastes divine. The packaging is beautiful, along with the rooster feather duster, the tin is nicely decorated and the honey dust itself is in a satin bag. The generous quantity in one container seems like enough to last for years.
While I purchased Honeysuckle, there are also Raspberries, Chocolate, and Strawberries & Champaign flavors. I have smelled and tasted each of the flavors and enjoy the unique, mild and accurate tastes of each one. It's a fun way to tickle and tease and then lovingly lick the spot that maybe got a little too tickled.
I've also taken to putting it on after a shower, in order to dry off quicker, keep my skin soft and smell good. And then that got me thinking - if I like it after a shower, would my children as well? And yes, they do. It leaves their skin smooth and dry and smelling like honey.
One of the uses that I haven't yet tried is cleaning up a wet spot. But apparently it does a great job quickly drying unwanted wet spots if you pour a little on, leave it for a minute or two and then clean it up with a tissue or hand vacuum.

It's a Cinch

2011-03-03T20:52:00.000-08:00

I don't have too much experience with cock rings. So far I've tried the little crappy vibrating jelly ones, one much more robust rubber one Lexi won at the Folsom Street Fair, and the Leather Cinch, generously provided by Bliss Connection. So far the Cinch is the only one that I would consider using at all regularly, though of course each of the kinds mentioned have their own benefits and detriments:

The little vibrating ones, like the Screaming Orgasm, are the easiest to put on, since they're super stretchy. The problem is that their stretchiness means they don't do one of the main jobs of a cock ring, which of course is basically to cut off the blood flow coming out of the penis. Also, they vibrate. I'm sure some people love that, but I've never really liked vibration (at least in that area). And since the vibrator stays right at the base of the penis, if there's any in-and-out action at all it doesn't really do much for Lexi except frustrate her.

The big rubber one doesn't vibrate (which is good for me), and does restrict blood flow quite effectively. But mostly, it's really a pain in the ass (or pain in the dick, I guess), to put on. I had to try several times over a few days before I finally could. I guess there's a technique to it, and probably some lube would have helped, but I guess it's not something I'm into enough to be willing to have it be a huge production every time.

The Cinch, on the other hand, is easy to put on and take off, since it's basically just a leather strap with a snap on it, and since it's adjustable it can fit pretty much anyone. Unfortunately, the snap and cinch mechanism are also the cause of one of the Cinch's biggest problems, namely that they have some little corners that feel sort of pokey and uncomfortable. And since it is so easy to adjust and put on and take off, it gives a very beginner/amateurish feel, but, then again, I am a beginner in this area, so that makes sense.

I have to say, though, that I guess I'm not a big fan of the feeling of a circulation-restricted penis in general. To me it feels like it becomes both more sensitive and less sensitive at the same time. Since it becomes larger and more veiny it rubs more, but for me somehow it feels like it also has some kind of desensitizing coating on it, almost like wearing a condom.

On the other hand, it looks good. At least, if you like super hard, veiny cocks. And really, who doesn't?

Masturbation scavenger hunt

2011-03-02T22:40:00.000-08:00

One summer in college I went to live with my grandparents. I told my previous boyfriend (who I still on occasion fooled around with) that I was worried it would be a sexually frustrating summer. I happened to be very wrong about that prediction, but out of the kindness of his heart, and enjoyment of getting to have a hand in my sexual exploits, he made a game for me. The game consisted of 13 different places or ways I was to masturbate. If successfully able to accomplish 10 of them, he would give me a prize.

That summer ended up being filled with wild sex on the beach, in cars, bedrooms, hot-tubs and pools. I actually barely having time to cross off items on the list, what with my 8-10 hours of anatomy class in the daytime and my "anatomy classes" at night. I don't think I can recall all of the details about what each task entailed, but there certainly were some memorable ones.

I think the first item that I was able to accomplish was masturbating while driving. I'd never thought of doing it before, but quickly found it to be a pleasurable distraction while I was stopped at red lights. For the first time I was begging the lights to stay red just a little longer.

It wasn't long before I figured out how to cross off another item on the list - masturbating in class. Our chairs were barstool style and at the beginning of a test I placed an eraser on the chair, under my crotch and slowly rocked on it. This did not help my speed with completing the test, but it did make it more enjoyable.

Scanning the list of options, I remember thinking that the idea of using a non-sexual object for masturbating sounded like a good challenge. Sure I'd heard of vegetables for that purpose, but what if my grandma saw me sneaking my used cucumber out of the house, to the garbage and asked if she could put it in the salad that night. I decided against food. I grabbed 6 pencils from my backpack and put them inside a condom. It actually felt pretty good after being on a sex hiatus for about 4 months.

That break from sex was soon to end though and with it I was able to check off another item - masturbating with another person present. I rekindled a friendship with a childhood buddy during that summer and one night we went out for a drive to the coast. As we sat in his truck overlooking the moonlight ocean, sexual tension that had been building peaked and our lips met. Our hands eagerly groped. When his fingers started moving down my pants, I stopped him and said "let me show you what I like."

I unzipped my pants, interlaced our fingers and started playing with myself. It wasn't long before his fingers joined in. We took turns me leading with the tempo, position and pressure and him continuing when my fingers got tired. It was the easiest times I've ever had reaching orgasm with external digital stimulation alone.

The final memorable task was public masturbation to orgasm. I interpreted this to mean anywhere where someone might see me. And sure I'd done that already, but I tried to think of somewhere that would be somewhat embarrassing if I were caught. I decided on the bench on my grandparents' front porch. I sat there with a book on my lap and put one hand down my pants. Not more than a few minutes after starting the mailman walked up to deliver the mail on the porch. I stopped, said hi, fairly certain he hadn't seen anything. After he left I went back to the task and reached orgasm before anyone else came up to the porch, though several people did walk by on the sidewalk on both sides of the street. I'm pretty sure it would have been hard to tell what I was doing.

After completing items on the list and recounting the incidents to my ex-boyfriend he gave me the prize - a lovely CD (OK by Talvin Singh) that I still have and listen to from time to time.

On the Ball

2011-02-10T23:17:00.000-08:00

Sex on an exercise ball?
Sounds like something the yoga, pilates and fitness nuts out there have probably tried. But I never dreamed that a sex specific variation of such balls existed. So when I opened the box from Bliss Connection and saw the Fetish Fantasy Inflatable Bondage Ball by Pipedream I thought it was just another gimmicky product.
The ball is black and made of plastic, rather than the rubber material of your typical exercise ball, feeling more like a pool raft. On each side there is a handle.
We followed the instructions and inflated it, at first trying by mouth, but soon gave up and used a hand pump. Unfortunately it fails my aesthetics test, as the ideal amount of air leaves the ball looking like a somewhat shriveled raisin. And sadly, it sat in our room unused for just over a month (admittedly, I was gone in Hawaii for three of those weeks).
I was also slightly scared of the ball for several reasons. The idea of placing my naked body on a cold plastic surface in winter was not appealing. I didn't really see how this ball was going to make sex any more enjoyable. I was scared that if we were both placing our weight on the ball it would suddenly pop and the fun of sex would be ruined by a broken tailbone. And what did the whole Bondage part of the name mean? Was I supposed to be tied to the handles? That seemed too athletic a feat even for me.
Now, after finally getting up the courage to play around on the ball, I'm just annoyed I didn't buck up and try it sooner. Let me tell you folks, this ball helps provide quite an amazing, wild ride.
Once I sat on the ball I realized it warmed right up. The buoyant and fluid movement it provided, rolling easily in all directions was really fun and relaxing. It allowed me to have lazy but very fulfilling sex, with more of my attention focused on my own pleasure. I do have to admit that there were one or two moments when I briefly lost my balance, but I was provided with the opportunity to get a slight abdominal workout with no real fear as I was fairly close to the floor. And yes, the ball could accommodate all of our body weight without popping (so far, at least). I still haven't figured out the bondage part of this toy, but I do like holding onto the handles and would be willing to to tied to them in a doggy-style position.
I found myself orgasming even more easily than usual while on this ball, which is saying something. Perhaps it's because I was more relaxed, or the angle was better or the rolling of the ball helped better synchronize my pelvic movements with my husband's. Whatever the reason, the ball made sex even fun and satisfying.
The variety in positions (lying on my back, sitting up, doggy-style over the ball) that are possible while on the ball was another pleasant surprise. I enjoyed the versatility, and being slightly ADD, liked that I could easily and quickly roll from one position to another. My husband however didn't have quite as much ability to vary his position and ended up with sore knees after the first go-round. A pillow for the male partner nicely complements this spicy piece of equipment.

Let's Make Love

2011-01-16T22:40:00.000-08:00

A sensual massage is supposed to be just that - appealing to the senses. And while I feel like an advertisement saying this, I highly recommend the Making Love Massage Oil. It will certainly help set the mood for giving and getting more frequent massages, and may lead to some good nookie. I purchased this product from Bliss Connection after tasting each of the flavors at a Bliss pleasure party that I hosted. It feels, smells, and tastes great. Containing vegetable oils, ginseng and vitamin E, this product is not too thick or greasy. It remains slick throughout long massages which is wonderful and seeps nicely into the skin for a pleasant post massage feel. It comes in Kiwi Pineapple, Vanilla and Strawberry & Champagne, so licking it off your partner can be as much fun as rubbing it in. I found each flavor to taste more like the real thing than I had expected, not the artificial fruity flavors in medicines or at the dentist's office. Being a huge fan of vanilla I ended up selecting that flavor. I find that the oil reminds me of vanilla/sugar cookies.
My only problem is that like all oils, while it feels good on the skin, it does tend to leave grease stains on the sheets if we go straight into the main event without showering - though showers certainly can be part of the foreplay. It's just sometimes hard to carve out that much time on an average night, so for us this massage oil has remained a spicy treat when used for whole body massage. Another idea for simple, everyday use of this product is during oral sex, as a fun form of lubrication with a great taste that makes you want to keep on licking that lollipop.

Key Party

2011-01-15T07:07:00.000-08:00

This is the continuation of Keys, last month's fictional story.

Amy sent the email invitation that night and checked frequently for responses. With the party date set for slightly over 2 weeks out she didn't have to wait long for all but Mike and Katie's reply. Three days before the party she got a call from Mike asking if it was too late to respond and explaining that they'd been on a Doctors Without Borders trip to Peru. Amy quickly assured them that they could come, glad that the absence of a response wasn't a lack of interest as she had feared, and feeling her heart race slightly with her schoolgirl crush.

Saturday evening finally came and couples began arriving around 7:30pm. Amy had coffee based drinks and desserts set out on the table. Even though everyone was there by 8:10, she gave them a few more minutes of casual mingling before asking if they could gather in the living room. She watched as the couples sat down, most of them next to the person with whom they had come, with a few notable exceptions. Liza sat down next to Keith, and Erin squeezed onto the edge of the couch next to Mike who had his arm around his wife, Katie. Dan was seated alone on the floor with his back against the couch, beneath his wife, Liza.

"Ok" Amy started, "we all know this is a key party and as such I have placed nine keys, one engraved with each man's name, in this pillowcase. We'll have each woman draw a key out of the pillowcase and you'll go home with that guy. You must return your date home tomorrow between 10am and 11am. There will be no questions, no exceptions and no exchanges. You are here because you are okay with any outcome, though I'm sure many of us are hoping for a particular one."

Everyone smiled, some nervously.

Amy started passing the pillowcase in a clockwise direction.

Raven took a key and sat silently, giving the pillowcase to Annette. All was quiet until Erin (the fourth woman) took her key.

"Well I'm ready," she stated and squeezed Mike's knee. He shot her a smile and everyone laughed.

The silence had seemed weighty and Amy was nervous that it meant people were unsatisfied with the key they had gotten or unsure of how to proceed. With this lightening of the mood, she took the opportunity to explain that everyone could hang out and get some more food and drinks until 9pm, at which point everyone was to have found their partner and left.

Amy drew her key last. Dan's name was on the key, and while she was relieved it wasn't Keith or Jim, she was a little sad that it also wasn't Rob or Mike.

Conversations started up again as people coupled up or asked whose key the women had gotten. By 8:50 most couples for the night had left. Ashley and Jon, Annette and Tim, and Amy and Dan were the only ones still talking in the kitchen.

"You don't have to play hostess anymore" Tim teased Amy, "I think I've got it covered."

"I'm sure you do" she responded, her mouth curling into a smile as she raised one eyebrow, "Just don't do anything I wouldn't do."

Amy grasped Dan's awaiting hand and were followed out the door by Ashley and Jon.

"Have a good night" Jon called as he and Ashley crossed the street to his car.

Dan's first generation Prius drove them smoothly and quietly the 4-5 miles to his house. They occasionally smiled at each other or made chit-chat, but it quickly fizzled out after brief answers.

Walking toward the house, Amy wondered whether Dan was shy, nervous or lacking interest in her. She hoped this would be more fun than awkward.

Dan and Liza's place was modest, a two bedroom condo, one room appeared to be primarily Liza's office with a smaller desk on one side that might have been Dan's workspace. The interior looked fairly new, but from the look of the complex, Amy thought it must have been a remodel.

"Would you like something to eat or drink?" Dan offered.

"I think I'm fine" Amy responded, "but I would like to use your bathroom. Where is it?"

"It's right here" Dan motioned, walking her through the bedroom.

When Amy returned, Dan was sitting on the bed.

"We've never done this before" he said looking at the ground, "and to be honest, I'd always thought myself to be a conventional one woman kinda guy."

"Oh?" said Amy feeling this great idea might not work out after all.

"Yeah" Dan responded nodding his head. "But Liza and I have been together since our freshman year of college, fifteen years ago, and we both need a change to our regular old routine, something to spark our sexuality again."

"So does this still seem like something you want to do?" Amy asked, making sure that it was going to be fun and not forced.

"I think so. I mean damn, what guy wouldn't want to fuck you." Dan responded, looking Amy in the eye and smiling. He really did have a winning smile and Amy couldn't wait to run her fingers through his longish hair. She leaned forward and rubbed his arm lightly. The signal worked and he responded, leaning in, their lips met for a long first kiss. By the time they separated the remains of tension in the air were gone.

Dan slowly opened the small buttons on the front of Amy's blouse, as if he was savoring every second. The anticipation was building, and with it Amy was becoming rapidly wetter. As they kissed again, her hands exploring the unfamiliar features of his body. She smiled mid-kiss as her hand brushed the swollen mass in his pants.

"What's that smile for?" Dan whispered.

"You're big" Amy responded. "Bet you've heard that before."

"Perhaps" Dan chuckled.

Amy ran her fingers along the outline of his cock and watched it throb, as if trying to escape from his pants. She shook off the sleeves of her shirt and as it fell to the ground behind her, she slithered off the edge of the bed, her chest now rubbing against him. She unzipped his fly and reached in, pulling out his eager cock. He was large, and the tip was glistening with drips of excitement. She rubbed her hand along it and then put her finger to her mouth, tasting his juices.

He moaned with exquisite and burning anticipation. She leaned forward and breathed on his cock, teasing him. He reached down, unable to contain himself. Grabbing under her arms, he picked Amy up and placed her on her back on the bed. He straddled her and reaching down unfastened her bra. Moments later, they were both naked, having frantically removed each other's remaining clothing.

Dan slid his fingers inside Amy as their lips met and she caressed his silky hair. Never before would she have thought him her type, but as spasms of ecstasy raced through her body, she found herself pleasantly surprised. He definitely knew a thing or two about pussy pleasing.

"Ok" Amy said in gasps as she gently pushed Dan onto his back, "now it's your turn."

She took as much of his engorged member in her mouth as possible and realized that she'd have to keep one hand around the base to deal with the bottom third. Soon saliva was dripped down, wetting him completely. His hips began trusting rhythmically. Amy could tell he was close.

"Do you wanna cum on my breasts?" she asked smiling.

"Oh. Yes" he moaned, as cum started shooting out, hitting her supple and perky C cup breasts. Amy couldn't help but lick his cock as he finished and cum dripped down. She found there to be something so wonderful about that degree of intimacy. She looked at him and grinned.

"Damn, I thought we were supposed to go all the way tonight" Dan said sitting up.

"Well it's only 11:30" Amy replied, looking at the clock on the bedside table. "You can cum again in the next 11 hours, right?"

"Yeah. This will just increase the amount of time we can have sex for" Dan smiled, already getting visibly hard again.

Amy could tell from his mischievous and horny grin that there would be very little sleeping that night.

Hardcore sexting

2011-01-12T21:34:00.000-08:00

[Ed. Please let me introduce Catalyst, a guest blogger and friend who is sharing her most private and juicy texts with us. This is the kind of stuff we've all secretly fantasized about writing and receiving. Lucky for her, this is from her real life. -Lexi]

K: Sorry, hope I’m not killing your mood by texting you so much. I’m just up at SMBT in the crazy weather thinking about being naked with you playing with your entire body.

K: What are you up to today?

C: Hanging out with my brother- tomorrow let’s fuck!

K: Ok, you down for sure?

K: You gotta check this out! I want to do this with you!

C: Hey- what time do you want to come over tomorrow?

K: 12 or 12:30. cool?

C: Yeah

K: Cool. You into this?

C: I haven’t checked out the website yet- I will tonight.

K: It’s hot. I want to do it with you!!

C: That shit is pretty crazy- I liked the last one where the chick straight up farts on the dude’s face- I didn’t know dudes like to swallow their own cum.

K: Yeah it’s kinda crazy. I’ll definitely lick cum off of you though. I am so excited to fuck you for hours!!! No rush or worries, just playing and fucking hard!!!

More juicy stuff after the break

=Next day=

K: You up?

C: I just woke up, why?

K: No, worries. Good, you’re all rested up then. I want to get out of here soooo bad!!!

C: Are you at work? Yeah-I still need to wax!

K: Yeah at work. Do you wax yourself? Is 11:30-12 cool to come by??

C: My brother slept over last night and he’s still here- I have to wait for him to leave

K: Ok. Let me know as soon as he is out!! I want to come play with you bad!!!!! Drink lots of water……! Oil and or lube needed??

C: Yeah- don’t know where my oil is-if you want, get some!

K: For sure!! I want to get slippery with you!! I can’t wait!!! I am going to tease you for soooo long.

C: Good- making me excited!

K: Mmmmmmmm. We have a lot of time and I plan on spending it on you. I want you to feel numb when I leave!!

C: Good shit- I gotta figure out how to get my brother going-he has no idea!

K: Dude, get him out ASAP!!! I want to get naked with you right now!!!!!!!

C: I told him one of my girlfriends is coming over to smoke, so he should be leaving soon.

K: Nice. Good call. Should I wait to leave until I hear form you?? I am so horny right now. Can’t wait!!!

C: Yeah-take it easy- buy some oil and I’ll get back to you

K: I’ll try! I want you sooo bad! I’m going to give you a nice long slippery rub and loosen you up after we puff a little. Then I am going to play with your pussy and get you soaking wet

C: Yes! Please do- I’m gonna rub your whole body with that oil!

K: Mmmm sounds sooooooooo fucking good!!

K: Is there a drug store in that plaza by you where I can get oil and lube??

C: There’s a drug store-I think you can find something there-are you finished with work?

K: Yeah, I can leave whenever.

C: Okay- cool

K: Should I still hold off on leaving?

C: I just told my brother he has to go cause I don’t want to smoke in front of him-he’ll be leaving soon

K: Cool!! I’ll start getting ready to leave. Then I’ll hit the store.

C: Cool-

C: My brother is leaving right now

K: Nice! On 280 almost to 92. Just come by?

C: Yeah

K: OK. Be there in a few!

=Later=

C: That was a real nice and dirty fuck sesh-we gotta do it one more time before my aunt gets back!

K: I agree!! I was soooo turned on when you were sitting on my face! Super hot. Also, when we were in the shower and we swapped saliva. I have a fetish with body fluids I guess. All that saliva and our tongues licking each other….Mmmmmmmmmmmmm

C: I felt like my pussy was suffocating your face, so I didn’t want to do it for that long. I really liked sitting outside and fucking you with my robe on-do you have a robe? If you do, bring it!

K: I think I might have one! What do you think about the whole licking and saliva sharing??

C: It feels good to be licked all over, especially while you are fucking me from behind and you’re licking my neck and kissing my back- I like licking you

K: I really like that too. When you were deep throating my cock and all that saliva was dripping from your mouth I was so turned on. I just wanted to have it all in my mouth!

C: Yeah, deep throating brings out all my juices!

K: I’m going to put those juices in my mouth next time and swallow all of it! So fucking nasty! I love it!!

C: We gotta try playing with my asshole some more- I want it to open up again

K: Ok. If we smoke again, I will get way into playing with your asshole. Probing around and licking everywhere sucking on it, tongue fucking it, everything

C: No worries on the sucking- I just want something probed in there like your cock. Can we do this next Monday?

K: I’ll get back to you on that.

C: Sounds good

K: No sucking on your ass hole, got it.

K: What about Thursday the 30^th? I’m off this day.

C: Sure-we can do that-30^th-yeah, no sucking the ass hole

K: Ha, ok! I really do want to explore the inside of your ass hole though!!

C: Why don’t I just explore your ass hole instead

K: Be my guest!! I was soooo turned on when you were fucking my ass hole hard and when I grabbed your hand and slammed it harder and deeper into my hole

C: Yeah- I liked how you pushed my hand deeper, letting me know how far in you wanted it

K: All the way!! I might even have you lube the shit out of my asshole and make you squeeze two fingers up there.

C: Wow- I want to finger fuck you faster and hard

K: I want to finger fuck you faster and harder

C: For sure, just have to start off slow so my asshole can get used to taking a finger fuck pound from you!

K: I will keep that in mind.

C: I want you to pound it though and tell me how nasty I am. Fuck it hard!!

C: That’s another thing! Talk dirty to me when I fuck you! That gets me off!

K: Ok. Sometimes I just get so caught up, I forget. How dirty do you want me to get??

C: Tell me how much you like feeling my pussy rub against you cock and that you’re gonna pound me harder if I don’t squeeze your cock tighter.

K: I want you to strangle my cock when I’m inside your tight wet warm pussy

C: Say anything to me- I just want to hear your dirty thoughts come out when I’m fucking you.

K: This may sound weird, and I certainly don’t think of you this way, but what if I said something like “bend over and let me fuck your pussy dirty slut.” Is that too over the top?

C: Hahahaha- that’s great-good shit. Yeah, say that and then pound me against the bed

K: Lol ok. Just trying to get a feel for how nasty and dirty. What about “get on your knees and suck my cock deep and be my whore.” Honestly, I feel weird typing it even but I’m sure I can do it.

C: I think I might laugh when you say it-but I will continue fucking-

K: Ha, I know I might, too. Just doesn’t seem natural to me. I like the idea of calling you my dirty little slut though when I’m fucking you from behind.

C: Yeah, slut rolls off the tongue easier than whore

K: Yeah. I want you to tell me to make you my slut and I can fuck you anyway I want.

C: Yes! I like that!

K: Tell me that you are my dirty little slut and you need to be fucked hard and your pussy needs to get pounded!

C: Hell yes- I’ll say that to you

K: Fuck yeah!! We are two dirty nasty ass fuck partners!!! Its awesome!

K: Pretty much!

K: I want you to suffocate me with your pussy and when I can’t breathe, I will grab your ass and just lift you off! I want my whole face smothered! I want my nose to be in your pussy!

C: Ha- that’s great- I want to rub honey or maple syrup on my pussy and have you lick it off while your face is all up in there

K: Let’s do it!! No holds barred!!! Whatever you think of, let’s create it!

C: Another thing-this might be asking much-but I really want to fall asleep with your cock inside me-can I take a short nap and then fuck again?

K: Yeah for sure! We kinda did it and it felt good to be out of it with your warm wet pussy just keeping my cock hard and warm

C: I didn’t fall asleep all the way cause I felt paranoid if you wanted to keep going-I want to actually pass out and start back up-and I agree, it felt damn good!

K: Oh, no worries, I thought you were out. Don’t be paranoid with me. I’m cool with whatever. Your pussy remained soaking wet, which was hot.

K: I want your pussy smashed on my face right now!

C: I want to watch you lick my pussy-lets do it in the bathroom-I’ll sit up on the counter!

K: YES!!! Why didn’t we fuck there more? Wasn’t thinking. Yeah spread your pussy open for me so I can run my tongue up and down and in it and bite your clit

C: I don’t know- I was high as a kite-I’m just super comfortable fucking in bed-I’m a lazy fuck

K: Hey I’m not complaining. Were you all close to squirting?

C: No-but it felt good-I feel like in order for me to squirt you would need to tickle the inside of my pussy with one or two fingers

K: Hmmm. More research required.

C: I think it will take a while and your arms is going to be very tired. Might be disappointed, too if nothing comes out.

K: Well you did piss on me, that’s pretty close!! Except I want to drink your cum!

C: I just have a feeling that its gonna take a lot of effort on my behalf and yours- I want to taste it, too!

K: I can’t wait to fuck you again. Let’s have a morning sesh!

C: Yeah-we’ll do it next Thursday like you said

K: I want your saliva!

C: Well you better shove your cock down my throat to get some!

K: I will, then I want you to be my dirty little slut and drip that warm thick strand into my open mouth!

C: I’ll be a dirty slut and drip it in your mouth and then make out with your face!

K: Mmmmmmmmmmmm fuck yeah!!!!! I want to play with a lot of saliva net time. And have you talk nasty to me and cover me with your spit!

C: You better talk dirty to me, too and slap my ass- I like watching my titties fit your face-haha

K: Yeah they were fucking smacking me!!

C: I love that-dude, if I had bigger titties, I would want to be titty fucked!

K: I want to role play with you where I go into your room like it’s and Asian massuse that turns into a nasty dirty slut while you rub me!!

C: Hell yeah- I can do that- you are so silly

K: You take me into your room in your robe, then tell me to take my clothes off and put a towel over me. Then you leave and come back and start to rub

K: Then your hands start to wander and you are doing nasty dirty things to me like finger fucking my asshole hard.

C: I’ll have you on the bed, stomach down-and I’ll slowly work on every part of your body-then I’ll slip my hands under your stomach and stroke

K: Wow!!! Yes that’s what I am talking about! My cock just got instantly hard!!

C: We need to role play-I think it would be fun-bring a robe! You need a robe to get into character-haha

K: Ok!

K: Is your pussy still sore?

C: Not anymore- quick recovery

K: Nice! Good to hear

C: Are you sore? Also, did you taste the lube?

K: I’m good. Yeah forgot to ask you that. I did taste it, wasn’t find of it.

C: Likewise-I think I’ll use olive oil or grape seed oil next time- it’s good for your skin!

C: Perfect and slippery as hell!

K: I want to fuck you soooo bad right now!

C: I was thinking the exact same thing this morning

K: Damn, soon enough!!! I was really turned on talking about you telling me you are my little dirty slut to fuck!!

C: In a way- I am your dirty fuck partner-prop me up on the counter and lick my titties while I rub your balls

K: Mmmmmmm. you little dirty ass motherfucker!!!! That’s not all you’ll be rubbing!!!

C: Fore sure-that was just the starter course!

K: Nasty ass, soooo fucking hot!!!

C: Are you gonna stroke right now?

K: In about two hours I am. Working , would love to pull my cock out and play with it right now though!!

C: Wish I could watch you stroke your cock-I like watching you jerk yourself

K: I like to jerk for you and watch your eyes as I stroke harder and faster.

C: I like when you just hold the tip of your cock and rub away

C: Damn-im getting horny-im clenching my pussy and making myself wet just thinking about it!

K: Finger yourself for me right now and tell me how wet and sweet your pussy juice is.

C: Its pretty wet-I can feel the lips of my pussy rubbing against each other-

K: Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm taste it for me!!!!

C: I can’t-im cooking right now-but I’ll taste some tonight!

K: Mmmmmm put some in the food!!! Ha make it sweeter!!

C: I don’t know about chicken soup with some pussy juice-I wouldn’t mind someone coming up from behind me while I’m cooking and rubbing his cock on my ass

K: And maybe sliding a finger or two into your already wet pussy…..

C: Yes! I’ll be in front of the stove and you just come up from behind and start rubbing my chest until my nipple get hard-I”ll be rubbing my ass against your cock that’s about to become hard…

K: You make my cock hard before you even touch it!!!!

C: I'm gonna rub you down and be your dirty little slut for the day-make me gag and slobber all over you!

C: Wish you could play with me in bed right now!

K: Mmmmmmmmmmmmm. You are sooooop fucking dirty. Yes, be my dirty little slut for the day and make me fuck you anyway you want. And I’ll fuck your mouth hard so you can spit warm saliva all over me!!

C: I’ll keep all the saliva in my mouth and drip it on your face and I’ll slather it all over your face with my tongue

K: You fucker, you are being such a nasty dirty slut right now and it’s soooooo fucking hot. Yes, drip that all over my face and in my mouth then lick it off of me and we will swap it back and forth in our mouths!!

C: I’m feeling pretty dirty! Lick my titties and bite on them REALLY hard! I want bite marks on them!

K: Mmmmmmm ok!! I want you to rub my back then lean over and whisper in my ear that you are there to be my dirty little slut for the day and I can fuck you anyway I want. And you want to start by gagging on my hard cock!

C: I’ll whisper in your ear: what are you going to do to your dirty little slut today? And then I’ll squeeze your cock to let you know how dirty I can be for you.

K: Ohhhhh fuck, almost came in my pants!!!

C: Good

K: Wow, I am all excited now. I like this new nasty dirty talk. Let’s keep it going!! In person of course

C: Yeah-this last sesh has been a turning point-

K: Yup

K: I’ve never fucked for that long continuously!!

C: We took breaks though-I’m serious about taking a nap while your stiff cock is still in me!

K: Oh yeah, we will do that. Then my cock will get soft in your pussy and you will have to fuck my ass with your fingers and get my cock hard again

C: If that’s what you want your dirty little slut to do then…

K: You are fucking turning me on sooooooooooo much when you say that!!!! Something about YOU being MY dirty little slut to fuck and tease and play with. Then I get to cover my naughty little slut with my warm load of cum!

C: Hahaha- you’re all silly-I don’t know what to call you though- owner and master seem pretty creepy

K: No way, I don’t want to be called that. I don’t know, it’s not the possessive connotation, its more of the idea that you are there to please me and do dirty things to me and for me.

C: I know that-but I want you to have a role

K: Got it. Hmm, a name is difficult to think of…how about fuck toy? Ha ha

C: I like that-you’re my fuck toy and I’m gonna play with you until you make me cum

K: Just got out of the shower jerking off and finger fucking my ass hole like you were!!

K: YEA!!!! Use me any way you want! Use my cock anyway you can!

To be continued...

Life is short. Have a what?

2011-01-11T09:16:00.000-08:00

The first time I visited the Ashley Madison website, I couldn't believe that was their tagline - Life is short. Have an affair.

I had heard about the service before and thus wasn't shocked by it's existence, but I was amazed that they would actively flaunt and sell their service as something that married people need. I have no problem with non-monogamous relationships, but I just don't fancy the dishonesty that having an affair implies.

For research purposes (to more thoroughly understand what Ashley Madison is like) my husband and I decided we would join the website and were soon get winked at, given virtual gifts, provided with keys to private photo showcases and emailed constantly (mostly by people we would never want to hook up with even if it was all out in the open).

The crazy thing about the service is that people pay a significant amount of money looking for someone with whom to have an affair - they charge credits to do almost anything. In order to possibly find someone, or even to get a basic response you have to send out lots of requests, each of which costs money. The service appears to give women the upper-hand, with men needing to sow more email seeds to get anywhere.

I have had fun browsing through the profiles, looking at some naughty private showcases and watching fleeting fantasies about a few of the guys drift through my head. I guess it's just the eHarmony, Match.com, or OkCupid of the cheating world. Once upon a time in college I had fun fantasizing my way through online dating profiles as well, but for me that kind of connection feels distant and slightly creepy. Also, I feel slightly nervous that I'll end up seeing a profile for some married man I know. And then what?

I know tons of people have met through online dating sites and made wonderful and fulfilling connections, and I'm sure Ashley Madison is no different. I, however think I'll stick to the real world and have my extra-marital relations with people who are open and honest in their relationships and the boundaries they and their partners have set together.

Sex across the country

2011-01-04T21:11:00.000-08:00

A goal of mine several years ago was to have sex in 10 states. I've now passed that and am at 11. I guess it's time for a road trip to see just how many states (not dates) I can pick up along the way.

States I have:

California

Colorado

Florida

Hawaii

Massachusetts

Nevada

New York

Oregon

Rhode Island

Virginia

Washington

And for good measure I'll put the countries I have:

America

Bahamas

Belgium

Britain

France

Netherlands

India

No More Sucking Please

2010-12-29T10:30:00.000-08:00

I feel that I need to put a couple of disclaimers at the beginning of this review as my opinion is definitely skewed. If you love nipple stimulation then you may want to ignore my review totally and try out this toy (with a partner).

I have recently (think 3.5 of the past 4 years) breastfed two children and used a breast-pump in addition, for when I was away at work as well as pumping milk for a friend's adopted baby. I got used to the feeling of suction on my breasts meaning that I was sustaining little human beings and not part of sexual play.

Also, for most of my adult life (even prior to having children) I was part of the 5% of people who just happen to lactate for no reason. This meant that milk could be expressed with minimal nipple stimulation - not something either my partner or I found sexually appealing (though I appreciate that some people do).

So now onto the toy I recently tried out courtesy of Bliss Connection - the Nipple Suckers. This cute little pink device, made by Pipedream is intended to increase the size and sensitivity of nipples. When the suction cups are placed over the nipples and the medical style pump ball is squeezed, the nipples immediately plump up. The less pleasant part of when I do it is that milk still comes out. And I'm over milk coming out of my nipples, at least for now.

I found that getting the suction cups to attach to my nipples was a very frustrating, if not an impossible feat for me to do alone. They had to both make a seal at the same time which seems like a poor design. However, with another person's assistance I was able to easily get them attached and pumped up. I did enjoy the tingly sensation that the suction created and the resulting large, eraser shaped nipples. My favorite feature is that once you either make the suction too intense or are done, there is an easy release valve that immediately breaks the seal.

Wicked Sexy

2010-12-26T10:28:00.000-08:00

You may have noticed the unusual and sexy (if I do say so myself) underwear I wore in my last post. I enjoy collecting and wearing panties and found these Chastity Heart ones at Wicked Temptations. They are part of a set that comes with heart shaped pasties. I know this is another photo of the back of these underwear, but really that's the most interesting part, with the front just being a very minimally covering strip of fabric that is actually somewhat uncomfortable.

Lewinski-esque

2010-12-25T17:00:00.000-08:00

Thanks to Bliss Connection, I have recently been orgasming with the aide of the Slender Sensations vibrator. This toy is a very thin and powerful little gem. At 6 inches in length, it's the size of the presidentially famous cigar, and little bigger than a pen. I was able to easily tote this vibrator with me on my vacation to Maui in my purse.

California Exotics has pleased me with several of their products, and this one is no different. Made of phthalate-free hard plastic, this vibrator actually felt comfortable both inside of me and out, and did not have any smell. The multi-speed functionality is controlled by twisting the bottom, and while I sometimes have a problem with this style of vibrator because the setting slips with accidental finger movement, I have not had this happen to me even once with this toy. Perhaps it will become looser over time, but right now it works perfectly.

I've found that with it's lack of girth, it does minimally well on my g-spot, but is amazing on my clit. The tip is tapered making it ideal for intensely stimulating the exact right spot. I've read that when inserted with a penis it can be a great g-spot addition, but found that with the size of my spouse's member this was not feasible, and only painful.

The one problem I have with the Slender Sensations is that if I get excited and press it more firmly against my clitoris sometimes the power decreases because of a faulty electrical connection. I've also heard that it's very easily broken by any water entering it, so this is definitely a wipe to clean toy. And speaking of that, baby wipes (any brand) are the best choice for cleaning your intimate toys as they work well, prevent the destruction that water can cause, can be kept right in the bedroom and are cheap.

Keys

2010-12-15T00:00:00.000-08:00

Amy and her boyfriend, Tim, had been itching for some fun. They'd posted an ad on craigslist for couples who'd be interested in attending a '70s style swinger key party. There had been a good number of responses, with a relatively few being skeezy. Amy decided to host an afternoon get-together with the interested people first, to scope out the true fuckability of the potential couples and get let everyone get to know each other a little first.

Culinary endeavors had always been a hobby for Amy and she felt that setting the mood with an aphrodisiac spread would help move things in the right direction. She made Blushing Ladies to drink, a papaya and pomegranate salad with ginger dressing, and chocolate fondue to be shuttled to the mouth with a variety of sliced fruits. At 3:30 in the afternoon Amy glanced at the clock, and then picked up the phone.

"Hey Tim" she said, speaking quickly. "Half an hour until our little soiree." She paused, listening. "I didn't think you forgot. I just wanted to make sure you were leaving work now." "Ok, see you soon then." She hung up the phone and looked around.

Everything on the table looked great, but catching a glimpse of herself in the mirror, realized she was a mess. She had half an hour to bathe and shave, dress and do her hair and make-up. Amy ran upstairs, quickly shedding clothing on her way down the hall. She turned on the shower and removed her hairband, shaking her long wavy brown hair loose. Grabbing some soap, she stepped under the water and rubbed her body, starting at her neck. She made little circles as she worked her way down her arms, over her breasts, stomach, shortly trimmed bush and long, toned legs. As she pulled out her razor and lifted a leg, she began to think about what the upcoming event would be like. She was hoping it would feel like everyone was placed in a simmering pot - lots of coy glances, steamy conversation and perhaps little suggestive hugs and kisses goodbye. The one rule Amy had made clear in the invitation was that no real action was to take place, that was to be saved for the real party, for those who were asked back.

The doorbell rang as she was putting on her earrings. She looked at the clock - 3:57. "At least I'm ready" she mumbled, "even if Tim's not home yet." Halfway down the stairs Amy stopped and smiled. Tim was home and had already answered the door. He was dressed fabulously in a tight black t-shirt that accentuated his muscular arms, and designer jeans which showed off his firm ass, from where Amy was standing.

"This is Keith and Erin" Tim said to Amy as she approached the entryway. Amy smiled, "glad to finally meet you both. It seems like we already know each other after all our back and forth emailing." While casual conversation between the two couples flowed easily, Amy couldn't help but feel a little disappointment. Neither was her type - both worked in real estate and somehow had a layer of sales grease stuck to them like pomade. "Oh well" she thought, "there's still 7 more couples."

Within 2o minutes only 1 couple was missing and Amy's mood had risen. There were definitely potential winners. Rob, the fireman and his wife Annette, a personal trainer probably ranked at the top of her list. Being blonde, Rob was not her usual type, but Amy felt she could make an exception for that body and deep sexy voice. Annette's high and squeaky voice however was her only visible shortcoming.

The other top ranking man was Mike, a suit wearing, pager carrying doctor. At 5'9" he was the shortest of the men, but his beaming smile, confidant demeanor and mildly Asian appearance, had Amy swooning. She glanced over at Mike who was talking to Tim, and the two men smiling at her across the table made her instantly blush. Escaping to the kitchen with an empty dish, Amy took a drink of water and fanned her face. Suddenly this key party idea seemed even more amazing. She took a few deep breaths and headed back out, toward the lively chatter of happy and engaged guests.

The last couple to arrive, Dan and Liza seemed average to Amy in every way. He was a 7th grade teacher and she, a freelance journalist. They were both slightly reserved, quickly placing themselves with one of the larger groups of people talking, each with an arm around the other and primarily listening to the conversation. Occasionally one or both of them would be asked a question and a concise reply would be given. Dan had shoulder length light brown hair that was tied in a ponytail and Liza's short chestnut hair framed her face.

Amy flitted around the gathering making sure everyone's needs were met. She didn't have much time to dive deeply into conversation with anyone, but did feel that she got a sense of whom her guests were. She felt a little bad for the long meat market glances that she (and others) couldn't help themselves from taking. But she figured it fair-play in this kind of a game.

By 6pm everyone was gone. Amy shut the door as the last 2 couples left and leaned up against it and sighing in dreamy exhaustion. The anticipation and preparation for the event had worn her out, and the remaining energy she'd reserved had all been used up hosting and fantasizing.

Tim walked up, running his hands from Amy's hips to her torso and back down. Pressing himself up against her and sliding his hands over her round and less than perfectly toned ass he whispered, "You did good, hostess."

"Thanks" she whispered back breathily in his ear. Then her smile faded and she bit the corner of her lip, the way she always did when something bothered her.

"What's up baby?" Tim questioned.

"Do we invite everyone?" I really don't want to end up with Keith."

Tim smiled, "It's only a one in eight chance that you'll choose his keys. Besides Katie and Liza both kept eyeing him, and I can tell you want Katie to be happy."

Amy rolled her eyes, but Tim did have a point, if Katie was happy Mike would be

"I guess there's someone for everyone" Amy responded. "Ok, I guess we'll invite them all and hope that lady luck likes me."

Lacking sensual love

2010-12-05T22:50:00.000-08:00

I love the Silver Bullet, a plain and simple, no frills toy. It's not cute or fancy, but it is cheap and gets the job done. But of course with such a good and basic design, companies are going to spruce it up, change it, and in my opinion, overdress it.

There are variations on the bullet that please me, but the Sensual Lover's Ring was not one of them. My husband and I spent a few weeks experimenting with this toy, courtesy of Bliss Connection, trying to find a way that would allow us to have a pleasurable experience. I believe that we failed to enjoy it for a few reasons.

The Sensual Lover's Ring is a cock ring made of a jelly material with the bullet encased in the plastic as well. There are bumps/nubs on the plastic covering the bullet to enhance the tactile experience. Neither my husband (when the bullet was over his perineum) or me (with the bullet on my clitoris) found the bumps pleasurable (they were pokey and painful).

It also turns out that my husband does not enjoy vibration, so using this toy while giving him a blow job was distracting and didn't enhance or speed things up, which I've heard really works wonders if the male enjoys vibration.

Honestly, if I were to choose a toy made from a bullet to pleasure myself during sex, it'd be the Micro Butterfly. It's compact, has 3 discreet settings and does not move away from my clit for a second.

Somewhat Delightful

2010-11-22T23:05:00.000-08:00

I have been testing out the Slimline G Orchid Delight, courtesy of Bliss Connection. This vibrator by Wildfire is unique in design from others that I own. It is created from a hard plastic and is completely rigid, a design that somewhat disturbs me since I prefer softer things in my sexual encounters, with the rigid stuff being used at the less pleasant gynocologist visits. While I have successfully achieved a number of orgasms with the Orchid Delight, I have mixed feelings about this toy.

The Orchid Delight is touted as a G-spot toy, and with a bulbus head and angled design, it certainly looks like it could be perfect, but alas for me it was not. I could barely feel it inside, perhaps because of the slim and smooth shaft there was minimal stimulation to my vagina during penetration.

Fear not dear readers, it worked well for clitoral stimulation. This toy has twist on power and can provide variable strengths of vibration, from low to pretty darn high. It was a strong enough intensity to really please me - but unfortunately even when I was able to stifle moans, the hard plastic made the vibration rather noisy. I do like that this toy is waterproof and have enjoyed it in the shower, where its own noises are drowned out.

I have also read that the Orchid Delight is enjoyable for anal stimulation and I can imagine that with the slim design and intense focused stimulation it could feel wonderful. I personally do not find anal play very arousing.

This is something I will use from time to time, especially in the shower, but it's not an all-time favorite.

Mmmmmm nipples

2010-11-02T23:19:00.000-07:00

I've had nipple clamps in the past. You know, the cheap kind that just open and shut and squeeze the life out of your sensitive little nips. After trying those a few times I thought I hated nipple clamps, so when I got a set in the mail a few weeks ago from Bliss Connection I was kind of disappointed and certain it was going to be a toy I wouldn't like. I was wrong.

These nipple clamps are different. Pipedream makes these adjustable "fetish fantasy series" alligator nipple clamps. You can choose the setting that matches your sensitivity the best - minimal pressure all the way to death grip. They look like real fetish gear, with a weighty chain connecting the shiny metal clamps covered with black soft rubber in the right places.

These clamps can be adjusted by tightening a screw (in each clamp) to decrease the pressure, or loosening it to increase the pressure. While I am aware that nipple clamps in the BD/SM world are often placed on the nipple at a low pressure setting and slowly loosened to increase the pressure, I could not tolerate this technique. While my nipples are not extremely sensitive, this kind of play was not enjoyable for me. Perhaps the springs on these clamps are also very sensitive, as they seemed to go from fun and painful to ouch with minimal adjustment.

Overall, I found this product to be a bit of spice for my sex life. I enjoy when the chain is pulled and like the way I look and feel having sex with the nipple clamps on. For the first time (and then a few more times in the past few weeks) I've really been turned on by this form of nipple play.

One word of caution with nipple clamps - they restrict (or cut off) blood flow to the nipples and should not be left on too long.

Only at Folsom Street Fair

2010-10-19T21:26:00.000-07:00

I've been to the Folsom Street Fair 5 out of the past 6 years. I love this event. I find it to be (for the most part) a place of acceptance where individuals of differing sexual persuasions and fetishes are appreciated and celebrated. Folsom is also does a magnificent job of matching BD/SM with raising money for good causes, such as paying to get spanked for AIDS and breast cancer research.
Another part of Folsom Street Fair that I particularly love is the game of dress-up that I get to do before going. I've worn all kinds of outfits - only underwear once, a corset twice, liquid latex another year and most recently electrical tape. I love how the crowds of eager photographers swarm around interesting outfits (mine frequently being one of them) and take photographs as if they are the paparazzi and the costumed people are celebrities. I, being vain and extroverted, find this situation highly enjoyable.
I think I'll make a top 10 list of unusual and wild things I've seen at Folsom over the years:
1) A booth that was advertised as "The Human Urinal" with eager pee drinkers and bathers.
2) A man holding a platform up with a chain connected to his balls. People were encouraged to place items on the platform.
3) A gay porn actor, standing on the counter of his porn-house's booth, masturbating to ejaculation on a jubilant crowd.
4) This guy with the cow tongue over his penis.
5) A gay porn actor sucking his own penis.
6) A person being pulled in a carriage by another person dressed as a horse.
7) People with bells sewn into their skin performing a group dance.
8) A man with "HIV+" tattooed on his penis.
9) A woman walking around the fair with a doll to her breast, as if she was breast-feeding it.
10) A handcuffed, gagged, and leashed woman with an electric, remote controlled buttplug. Her mistress was letting participants in the crowd take turns toying with the remote controller.

2010-10-12T21:45:00.000-07:00

Hi folks, Joe here.

As you may have noticed, it's been a long time since Lexi's last post. The reason for that is that a few weeks ago her sister was diagnosed with breast cancer, and she's been spending most of her free time researching breast cancer-related topics.

As you may know, October is national breast cancer awareness month, so feel yourself up accordingly.

Pet rock, 2010 version

2010-09-21T14:58:00.001-07:00

I purchased the Nea from Bliss Connection after getting a chance to hold it at my pleasure party. I drooled over the wonder of owning this toy for a few weeks before making the purchase. While it's sometimes challenging to grasp that I could still NEED another vibrator, this one is unique. It reminds me of a pet rock, but so much more satisfying. The Nea is a very small, ornately decorated, and relatively weighty clitoral stimulator. The curve of this toy allows it to rest snugly over the pubic bone. It is made by Lelo, a reputable Swedish sex toy manufacturer of fairly high end toys.

I was in love with the Nea from the moment I received it. The packaging was amazing, a beautiful black box, with the Nea resting inside on a stand, beneath a clear plastic cover. Included was a white satin drawstring bag in which to carry the Nea, a detailed but not too lengthy instruction manual and the charger. Yes, this toy is rechargeable!

After removing my Nea from its pedestal, I eagerly tried to turn it on, but was unable. I was sad that it came uncharged and that I would have to wait. I started flipping through the manual and soon found that it can be locked during transport (if you hold down both buttons at once). Genius! I picked it up, pressed the buttons and was able to unlock it and have it come to life.

I gave it a whirl. It is simple and elegant in design. It only has 2 buttons and because of the curve in the toy, they were easily accessible to me during use. It has 10 speeds, from super low, to intense. It also has 3 different speeds of pulsation as well as one escalation. Besides being discreet with regard to size, it is a relatively quiet vibrator.

I have used the Nea in multiple different ways now and have enjoyed them all - tucking it in my panties, lying on top of it, holding it against my clit, placing it between me and my husband during sex. The toy itself comes in black, white or dark pink. All colors have a beautiful floral pattern on the hard plastic exterior. And as with all of Lelo's toys, it comes with a 1 year warranty.

Diving In Deeper

2010-09-15T23:23:00.000-07:00

After a somewhat restless sleep I rose and carefully picked out my clothes. I wanted to wear something hot, but not ridiculous. I pulled out a longish skirt - it came to just above my knees - but decided to be slightly daring by not wearing panties. The shirt I chose had a low scooping neckline that presented a bit of cleavage. My walk to class was slow and measured, but my heart was pounding. I arrived about 5 minutes before class and sat down outside the door. Moments after opening a book, a few of my classmates walked up, also waiting for our class to start. I felt a sinking in my stomach, I wouldn't be alone to greet my professor.

He arrived exactly at the top of the hour and as he unlocked the door, his gaze fell on me. "Good morning," he said. I couldn't believe he was talking specifically to me - it must be because of our brief conversation at the pool the day before, I thought. I had to assume that this blossoming relationship was simply in my head so as not to feel insane, so just gave a hint of a smile and walked past him into the classroom.

I took a seat in the front row and as my professor rummaged through papers on his desk, I began fantasizing about crossing and recrossing my legs like Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct. I hiked my skirt up slightly but realized I was too nervous to pause with my legs open while crossing them. I looked up, he was right in front of me, touching my desk. "What?" I said, smiling nervously. I hadn't realized that class had started, but everyone else had their books open, or at least on their desks.

"What did you see as the main philosophical differences between W.E.B. Du Bois and Booker T. Washington?" I realized then that he was repeating a question I had half-heard while daydreaming and he was specifically asking me. "Umm." I stalled to regain my focus. Luckily, having read the works of each man the night before, I was able give a satisfying, though somewhat disjointed critique. He smiled and turned to the class, "Yes, they both strived to meet the same goals - eradicating racism, discrimination and segregation. And yes, their proposed methods were disparate."

I fell back into a daydream, watching my hot professer's every gesture. His fingers combing absently through his chestnut hair, the nod of his head, a smile playing at the corners of his mouth all made me feel slightly warmer and perhaps a little wet. I gathered my books and notebook together without thought and followed the other students out the door at the end of class. It wasn't until I was halfway back to my dorm that I realized, with some annoyance, that I had left without even stalling to talk to him. "Ah well" I thought, perhaps I'd see him at the pool soon. Anyway, in the worst case, it was only two days until my next class.

That evening as I approached the pool, I hoped so strongly that he'd be there, that I felt he might just magically appear on the diving board. But no luck. I changed into my swim suit and went back out to the pool, begging my eyes not to look at the empty diving board, but looking anyway. The 11 other divers on my team slowly arrived and we took turns practicing our dives with direction from our coach. We tried to stay warm by wetting our shammies in a bucket of water and wringing them out over our heads as we waited. After some dryland exercises at the end I went to shower and change. As I walked toward the locker room he appeared, just heading to the men's locker. "Hi," I said enthusiastically, unable to hide my excitement. He chuckled "Well, hi." "You're here to dive? Three meter?" I asked, stupid questions rolling easily off my tongue. "Yep" he nodded, "I have to wait until you diving team people are out of the pool." Obviously, I thought. I smiled and turned to leave.

"Hey, wanna dive with me?" he asked "perhaps I could teach you a thing or two. I was an NCAA All American back in the stone age." All the lust in my body wanted me to say yes but the the words that came out of my mouth betrayed me. "I think my teammates and coach Pam would think it's weird." "Pam and I competed together in college. I can talk to her if anyone says anything. Besides, it's not weird for people to dive together." A wide and playful smile lit up his face. Was I imagining things? "I'll be back in a few," he called over his shoulder.

I went into the locker room and showered to warm up a little and think. "This must be a dream," I kept saying to myself. Or I'm truly crazy. Perhaps I was talking to myself outside and just imagining him there. I waited 12 minutes and headed back out. Luckily, in that time most of my teammates had left.

"I thought maybe you'd chickened out" he called from the top of the diving board as I walked toward the deep end of the pool. "Nope. Just needed to warm up in the shower a little." He took a few practice bounces and then walked toward the end of the board, effortlessly performing a reverse dive.

"So what do you wanna learn?" he asked as he reached the side of the pool. I blushed, being unable to quiet my inner dialogue. "What's your weakest dive? he asked without a pause, but also smiling. "I don't know, Professor Thompson, I'm not great at inwards. I'm a little scared I'll hit the board." "Call me Dylan" my professor stated, chipping away at the academic wall dividing us. I nodded my head and felt like I continued to look like a bobble head for the next significant amount of time, as he explained, demonstrated and critiqued the inward one and a half. And while I was having an decent time, it was a relief when he finally said "everyone's long gone, sorry for rambling on, let's call it a night." I agreed and briskly headed toward the locker room, quite cold at this point.

I was just about to reach for the door when his hand grabbed my arm. "I was hoping that since we have the place to ourselves..." his words trailed off and I believe my mouth fell open. I really must be dreaming, I thought. I looked down at his Speedo and noticed an unmistakeable bulge. I put one hand on his chest. "Can I take that as a yes?" he asked. I nodded my head, still standing there dumbstruck. He pushed the door open and I followed him into the women's locker room.

We were barely through the door before he started pulling at my swimsuit. As my single garment fell to the floor, he pulled me close, kissing me with intensity. I willed myself to be present, but only with partial success. His hands moved up and down the curves of my body. I buried my head in his shoulder, soaking up his smell, despite the overtones of chlorine.

I began shivering, perhaps out of cold, but more likely from anticipation of something unimaginable. "Let's get in the shower," he said turning me around and guiding me by the hips. I could feel his cold swimsuit against my butt and began reaching to pull it off. He let go of me and turned on the water, allowing me to easily undress him. He turned to face me as the warm water started pounding on my body. It was almost too much to bear - sweet, soothing comfort of warmth and his beautiful body in front of me with the happily protruding sign of his desire. I kneeled down to suck his cock. For a moment I worried that I wouldn't be good enough, but then I quickly calmed down seeing his eager delight and reminding myself that it wasn't as if this was my first time. I began working his shaft with my mouth and hands, at times letting one hand wander - balls, anus, legs and chest. Just when his breathing started to really get short, he stopped me. Leading me to one of the nearby benches, he laid me down and spread my legs. He kissed my breasts, stomach hips, naval and as his fingers moved inside my wet vagina, his mouth went to work on my clit. I too was soon gasping for air. However with the tables turned, I didn't stop him as he moved me toward climax, instead letting myself explode in his arms. As I lay there our eyes met and he spoke slowly. "Before we go any further, I just want you to know that this is something I've done before. Slept with students." "Ok" I replied. "You're not my first either." "I actually do it with some regularity," he stated, admitting a more complete version of the truth. "I'm okay with it," I responded, shoving away my unease for the pleasure of the moment. "Alright then. As long you don't have long-term expectations."

Leaning toward me and kissing me deeply, his tongue explored my mouth. He pulled me up to a sitting position and went around behind me. As I leaned over the bench, his hands grabbed my sides and his penis slowly eased into my wet pussy. The thrusting and our moans built in speed intensity and volume. For a moment I thought about the possibility of someone else coming into the unlocked locker room. That thought and the banging I was receiving pushed me over the edge. My pulsations and bucking in pleasure during the orgasm led rapidly to his climax. We slid off the bench and lay next to each other on the floor, my head on his arm, as we listened to the sound of running water.

Papillon

2010-09-11T14:06:00.000-07:00

I used to have this cool little remote control sex toy that my husband and I used together in college. The Butterfly was attached to an elastic strap that worked like g-string underwear. My husband (boyfriend at the time) would hold the controller and then suddenly turn it on and surprise me. My clearest memory is wearing it while hanging out in the little snack lounge at my husband's college. He would randomly turn it on as I was talking to someone and I'd either smile or laugh...good times.

Unfortunately that toy did not survive more than perhaps a year of intermittent use. I was recently feeling somewhat sad as I recounted it's use in a previous post, and Chrystal from Bliss Connection must be carefully reading my blog, as she sent me a different, but similar toy - the Micro Butterfly from California Exotics to try out.

The Micro Butterfly is a sweet little bullet vibrator, covered with a soft jelly butterfly shape, including mildly vibrating antennas. It has 3 different intensities - low, high and super high, which is perfect for my taste. It has thin, bra-like straps that go around the legs and waist to hold the butterfly in place for hands free use while leaving the vagina and anus available for other toys or partner play.

While the straps may seem like a nice feature, they were far from perfect.

1) The straps are adjustable, but I found myself at the (slightly uncomfortable) limit of the leg straps and unable to effectively close the waist strap - and I'm only a size 8 woman. This is frustrating.

2) The straps are thin pieces of elastic that dug into my skin. It would be much nicer if they had a little padding. And to be honest, I kind of expected a little more quality from a company like Cal Exotics, especially after using their Lia Wand.

3) The hands-free feature is not incredibly exciting when it's not a cordless device. I think having a vibrator strapped to my clit is much more thrilling when I can walk around without the cord and battery pack trailing, and when someone else can control it without my awareness.

I tried out the Micro Butterfly both solo and during intercourse. As a masturbation toy, the hands free feature is somewhat enjoyable. I can recline, flip through porn on my computer and just turn up and down the intensity as need be. During sex this little toy was orgasmic as well, but a bit tricky to work with. I had difficulty keeping it in place (it's small so it needs to be perfectly aligned) and remaining comfortable (due to the tight straps). But, when everything was adjusted just right, it only took a small number of thrusts before the combination led to orgasmic bliss. I got to have the highly sought after (and fireworks quality) blended orgasm from my two favorite sources at once - my husband's penis and a clitoral vibrator. It's a decent product, but with a small redesign it could be much better.

The god of sexual love is a lubricant?

2010-09-08T00:11:00.000-07:00

After my post about Liquid Silk (a water based lubricant), Bliss Connection sent me a bottle of Eros silicone lubricant to try. I had never tried a silicone lubricant, being very satisfied with Liquid Silk, but I was happy to give it a whirl.

I took a few minutes to read about it since I have gotten yeast infections with the use of some lubricants, but this product met my criteria - glycerin-free, hypoallergenic and non-toxic. I rubbed a drop on the back of my hand to see what it felt like. It was silky smooth and the single drop seemed to go a long way - soon the entire back of my hand felt slick and lotiony feeling, but not wet. I was also easily able to wash it off with some soap and warm water after the trial, another bonus.

The next time my husband and I were going to have sex, I put a few drops on my fingers and slid them inside my vagina. Immediately with penetration, I noticed that while I didn't feel wet like I do when I'm either really aroused or using a water based lubricant, the sex felt extra slippery and smooth. I must admit I felt slightly weirded out at first because in my mind good sex is associated with a dripping wet vagina, and this wasn't exactly that. As the minutes went by and easy penetration continued, my mind slowly began to accept that this new sensation could also signify good sex.

I've now tried Eros several times during intercourse and enjoy it's effects. In my opinion it's more than just a lubricant, as it has a different feeling from my body's natural lubrication. My husband and I agree that it makes sex feel tighter (nice) and creates more friction while not feeling at all dry. I still think we will switch back and forth between Eros and Liquid Silk since we enjoy variety and I am still more used to the wet feeling. We haven't taken the dive into anal sex with this lubricant but apparently it's the best for making it comfortable. Also for condom users, this lubricant is latex safe.

This wand is magic

2010-09-04T23:30:00.000-07:00

I got a Lia Magic Wand a few weeks ago from Bliss Connection and have been giving it some good use. I handled it for the first time at the pleasure party I hosted and decided right then and there there that I needed to have it. This vibrator is so different from anything else I own.

The texture is smooth, a little squishy and reminiscent of skin. It came with no smell whatsoever, which made us friends from the start. The Lia Wand by California Exotics is made out of matte silicone and is waterproof. It is a g-spot vibrator with great flexibility and a slight curve at the tip, which makes it easy for me to manipulate internally. It has three bulges, which are still relatively slender, but adds a nice contoured aspect for penetration. The fact that it's so slender and soft make it a perfect first g-spot vibrator. I find it highly enjoyable, but sometimes just wish it were a little girthier. Some people have mentioned the potential use of this toy for anal penetration since it is not very large and has ripples, but I don't have personal experience with this yet.

I noticed that the vibration appears to be focused in the tip, making it great for clitoral stimulation as well as vaginal penetration. The quality of the vibration is very unique. It has 10 different settings - they can be categorized as 3 different speeds/strengths; 6 various frequency pulsations and 1 escalation. It is not the quietest of toys but does have the lovely kill button. I can stop it without having to cycle through to the off position and when I turn it on again, it goes right back to my last setting which means I can pick up exactly where I left off after the interruption dealt with. The buttons are, like the rest of the toy, high quality and require little effort to press. It is also very simple to use as there is only the on/off button and the one to change the setting.

The Lia Magic Wand is a new favorite and will be in my regular rotation of toys.

A night out

2010-09-01T23:15:00.000-07:00

The first party ended with a kiss. It was fitting since I was leaving that party in order to get to the KISS party on time. Honestly, part of why I had wanted to go to the first party of the night was to get just that kiss. I had flirted with the same guy the week before at a different party, kissed him about 5 years ago and was hoping for another kiss that night. And the meeting of our lips was the perfect appetizer for the playful night ahead.

We arrived at KISS and despite it being 11pm when we arrived (fairly late for us) only one couple was fucking. Most people were dancing and hanging out in near the dance floor - still in the early stages of foreplay. There were professional pole dancers demonstrating their tricks and happy to teach those who wanted to learn. I played on the pole for a bit while my husband sat and watched from the bench nearby. One of the pole dancers asked me if she could give him a lap dance. I happily agreed and over she went.

After a bit more dancing and chatting we decided to roam the club again. Most rooms were still empty, or at least lacking in action, so we stopped by the bar and then headed to the large room in the back.

It had beds lining 3 out of the 4 walls and a large bed in the middle. While there were people on most beds, all eyes seemed to be focused on the action in the large bed. A man was laying on his back with 2 women on top of him, one on his face and another on his penis. The ladies were facing each other - at times kissing, caressing each other or just moaning with pleasure. We took our seats on one of the beds along the wall and watched too. After a little while I wanted a closer look and asked my husband what he thought about sitting at the head of the big bed. "That's a bold move" he said with a smile and we scooted in to watched, making out with each other a bit as well.

Not too much time passed before a hot couple I'd noticed earlier entered the room. They were hard to miss as she was over six feet tall with shoulder length blond messy hair, wearing only a red lacy thong and he was a clean cut slightly shorter, professional looking guy. They stood at the foot of the bed kissing for a couple minutes, their eyes dancing between the threesome and us.

I smiled as they walked toward the head of the bed. "Do you mind if we join you?" the guy asked. "Not at all" I replied. "I'm Steve and this is Audrey" he said giving introductions that included formal handshakes. After a short time Steve started whispering to Audrey. Then he turned to my husband "would be okay if I ask her for a kiss." We both agreed and I found myself enjoying a long deep kiss. When we stopped, Steve said to Audrey, "you need to kiss her lips, they are so soft." Eagerly we both leaned forward. Kissing another woman is an amazing tactile experience - everything is softer and sweeter tasting. We kissed each other for a few minutes as our partners caressed our bodies.

Then, after my husband had an opportunity to kiss Audrey, while I went back to kissing Steve, things moved to the next level. Hands caressed bodies, and unless I visually traced the line from the hand up to the person, I lost track of who was touching who. The flow was so easy and natural that as lips met and bodies moved, we were all connected in pleasure. Naturally, and without conversation, both couples moved toward oral sex and then vaginal intercourse as we remained an interconnected foursome.

At some point the threesome behind us had ended and one of the woman was suddenly seated behind Audrey holding on as if she was also having sex with Steve. This was fun to watch, as I had never imagined such an threesome, so engaged in the same act, riding the same wave.

As I was sitting atop my husband, he asked who was grabbing his penis. I looked down to see the other woman who had been in the initial threesome stroking him as he slid in and out of me. I smiled at her and noticed that she was quite ecstatically receiving oral sex.

"Wow!" I thought, "we were 7 people all connected in what appeared to an X-rated game of Twister." And as with Twister, people kept shifting around, not affixed to one person or location. I gave a few of the women a little of the Nympho's Desire and they each soon vocalized their approval of the increased sensation.

Time passed without my knowledge and some point things changed as one or two at a time people left the bed. Orgasms had been reached, breaks from the hot, sweaty action were needed. Audrey and Steve had gone to look for some friends with whom they had come to the club.

I pulled out my Lia Magic Wand and started playing with myself. The bright pink g-spot vibe was well lit as I lay back and alternated between sliding it in and out and tickling my clit. I'll review this toy soon, but for now let me just tell you that it was fun for me and I think those watching enjoyed my toy as well.

Awhile later Sarah, a woman my husband had talked to at the beginning of the night, walked into the room. We were just hanging out on the bed, back in watching mode. I called out to her and when she came over I asked "would you like to join us?" "Sure" she replied. She had large breasts which I enjoyed playing with, and soon I was kissing her as my husband and I caressed her body. I noticed right away that her lips tingled and felt a little electrically hot. I asked what was on them and she just smiled, keeping her secret.

After some more making out, I asked Sarah if I could use my Lia Wand vibrator on her and she agreed. I slipped a condom over it, feeling very much like a man and started thrusting. I'd never had this kind of control and really found it arousing. I cycled through the 10 settings until I found the one that seemed to make her moan a little more than the others. I stayed on that while my husband caressed and made out with her.

Steve and Audrey reappeared a little later and we got to have one more round of play. The night had certainly exceeded our expectations. The promise of new fun adventures upon a return visit hung in the air as our kind and hot hosts bid us goodnight with delightful kisses. We eagerly await another KISS party as soon as our busy lives permit.

Whip it

2010-08-29T14:54:00.000-07:00

I bought this little Play Whip from Bliss Connection at the pleasure party I hosted. I loved the feel of it and so did a number of my friends who attended the party. It made a nice smacking sound with only the most minimal sting.
Since getting the whip I've both used it on others and had it used on me. My husband can smack my ass with it as hard as he likes, with the satisfying sound of a good whipping, but with almost no pain or markings. If you have a partner into being a dominatrix, but you are not really into pain, this may be ideal. Also, if some pain is the desired goal, wetting the tips does make it smart.
Just carrying it around (granted I've only carried it out in the open in a sex club) made people beg me to use it on them. One man, after asking his female companion if it was okay, requested I whip her while she was bent over, grabbing her ankles. Teasing the woman's bare booty and genitals while he watched and she asked me to do it harder, was amazing. I felt so powerful. And we all had a good time. I also enjoyed that there was no risk of injuring strangers while whipping them, even when I got really into it.

KISS

2010-08-26T14:50:00.000-07:00

After reading an article in the SF Gate, my husband and I decided to apply for membership at the KISS sex club. KISS is touted as a club whose members are young, hip, playful and attractive. Mr. and Ms. Kiss host twice monthly parties in a inconspicuous Mission District location in San Francisco. The hosts informed me that the name has recently been changed from Club Kiss to KISS.
The parties are $60 per couple and free for single women. No single men are allowed to attend. This setup means that there is lots of girl/girl action, threesomes and foursomes. The single women who we noticed there seemed to enjoy some amount of bisexual play, which makes sense as there are no single men with whom to hook up one-to-one. And the lucky men who are admitted with a female partner are likely to get attention from more than just the woman they came with, if that's desired.
Of course in any situation like this it's important to set and be well aware of you and your partner's boundaries, and KISS has some sensible rules and guidelines to ensure that everyone has a great time. These rules are reiterated as part of the tour that newbies are given on their first visit. The way the tour was run, it also left us feeling welcome and wanted, like friends visiting from out of town.
The layout of the place reminds me of the houses I've been to in San Francisco. The place encompasses the entire second floor of the building, with numerous rooms. There's a dance floor including one of my favorite features (a stripper-pole) and dancers who are happy to teach tricks, as well as an admiring audience that doesn't have the sleazy strip club-like feel. Four play rooms of different sizes (from very intimate to huge) are scattered throughout the club, as well as a bar (you bring the booze and they provide the mixers), a patio for smoking and outdoor (enclosed) encounters, and a coed restroom, complete with disposable mini toothbrushes.
From the moment we arrived we realized KISS would probably be more fun than we'd been expecting and that we were a little overdressed, as one lady walked by us in just a red lacy g-string and some others were wearing little more. The host couple was just as attractive as their photographs suggested and so were the attendees. The vibe was relaxed, not over the top horny but filled with anticipation of a good time. And for us the evening was definitely the best that we've had in a sex club.
If you would like to hear an account of the more intimate details of our experience, check back on the 1st of September for a full recounting of our lusty adventures.

I smell like musky melon

2010-08-24T21:43:00.000-07:00

At the Pleasure Party I hosted, we all tried on Jelique's Pure Instinct Cologne. Because of the pheromones in this product, it is marketed as a sex attraction cologne. It is a unisex cologne that I would enjoy on men as well as women, but may be slightly too fruity for some men (and strong smelling when first applied).
I bought a bottle of the cologne at my party and have been wearing it ever since. I'm not sure that it has any sex attraction effect other than that it makes me feel happier and more appealing. That change in feeling about myself is all that the product really claims to do anyway "to elevate confidence, enhance moods and awaken the senses."
The most interesting thing about this fragrance to me is that it smells different on each person. I really like the way it smells - from cotton candy, to melon, to musk, citrus, and cucumber. The fragrances seemed to change over the first 15 minutes after application and then lasted for a 2-3 hours. While the pheromone properties are said to last up to 12 hours, since I'm wearing this primarily because I like the smell, I am a little disappointed that I have to reapply it every few hours in order for me to keep experiencing the scent.

A pleasurable party indeed

2010-08-22T16:03:00.000-07:00

Last week I hosted a Bliss Pleasure Party. I had never hosted a pleasure party or even attended one, but I felt that I was up to the task since I love most things dealing with sex, women, dessert and drinks. I decided to make the theme for the party be Sexy Little Secret and the partygoers wore some sexy little thing (jewelry, perfume, clothing, shoes or some other accessory). At one break some ladies even provided a peek at their sexy little bras and panties.

I made a variety of drinks - Jello shots with various secret ingredients, sangria, and a punch that Chrystal our "sexpert" gave me the recipe for called Pink Panty Dropper Punch. And as you can guess, with all these drinkies my talkative friends became even a little more loquacious.
I invited a fun group of ladies and 12 of them graced us with their presence. The guests brought sexy desserts that had secret ingredients such as chocolate cookies with a cherry inside, blowjob shots, creamy balls (cream puffs) and drunken watermelon salad (that tasted like watermelon mojitos). Shortly before the first guests arrived Chrystal pulled up with her mobile sex-toy emporium. She quickly and unobtrusively went to work turning my bedroom into a sex toy store. I regret to say that my bedroom will probably rarely have the potential for that much fun - vibrators, lotions, bondage gear, male masturbation toys and much, much more.

Chrystal also set up my living room beautifully for the presentation portion of the evening. After an hour of socializing with friends and partaking of food and drink, we took our seats for the talk. I honestly did not know what to expect, I liked the interactions that I'd had with Chrystal and was hoping that she'd make good her promise of making the presentation more than just a sales pitch.

Chrystal had done a good job taking the social temperature while we had been hanging out and seamlessly kept the same vibe throughout the presentation. She had a way of making us all feel like friends (even though some had never met each other before), comfortable and able to talk about anything. She started with introductions and a game which resulted in everyone getting a good case of the giggles and 2 lucky ladies winning little vibrating prizes.
The presentation was clearly organized with each person getting a menu (specifically designed for my party) with all of the items that would be shown and discussed. The order in which the items on the menu were presented was perfect for creating a lusty and aroused mood. Chrystal starting with the foreplay and stimulating goods and ending with the powertools. She passed around each of the items and let us touch, taste, smell, or play with each product as was appropriate. She also described her experience with the products as well as other people's reviews. The full sensory experience of having the toys and mood enhancers right there helped me to get a much better idea of what I would truly enjoy. And everything that I bought has been used repeatedly in the week since the party.
After the presentation Chrystal met with each woman who wanted to purchase something in my bedroom (sex toy store) so that they could privately place orders and get their wares. Because Chrystal carries so much with her we all got most of our things right then and there which makes the night of the party all the more fun, especially if there's an eager partner waiting for you at home. The presence of our new supplies encouraged us to excitedly have sex twice in the 12 hours following the party (which is unusual because of our chaotic lifestyle, due largely to our early-rising young children). In all ways the party and its aftereffects surpassed my expectations.

Wait, I thought eggs come out of females...

2010-08-19T22:03:00.000-07:00

Hi Folks! Joe Larkspur here, always ready to pitch in and help, and always ready to share my opinion with the world. In this case Lexi did indeed need help, since in order to try out this toy effectively she was, shall we say, lacking certain essential equipment.

The Egg is a male masturbation sleeve from the Japanese company Tenga. This is their budget toy, at $6 a pop (their fancier "onacups" can be more than twice as expensive), but since they're supposed to be single-use that could quickly add up.

There are six different styles of Egg, with different kinds of bumps and ridges on the inside. I tried the "Silky", which has some low-key ridges. It looks like some of the other styles may be a little more aggressively textured, so if this seems like your thing you'd probably want to try them all and see which one works the best for you.

Ok! enough preliminaries. On to the actual experience…
Once I had taken a couple strokes with the Egg, my first thought was, "wow, this feels almost exactly like a vagina." Unfortunately, that sensation only lasted for a couple minutes. There were two things I noticed that may have contributed to the decreased sensation. One is that the lube started to get pretty sticky (oh yeah, each egg comes with a little packet of lube, which is both necessary for the Egg to work at all and, for $6, expected). I guess you could use a different kind of lube if you wanted, but I'm a cheapskate. If they give me some lube, by golly that's the lube I'm going to use. The second problem was that the egg got pretty stretched out after only a short time. That may have been because of how massive my wang is, but it's more likely that I was just using it wrong. Looking back at the pictures (what, you think the only pictures of Lexi and her toys are the ones she posts here? And turnabout is fair play, after all…), it looks like I had a lot of the egg material bunched up around the base of my penis, and the end was really stretched out. I guess this makes sense for me, since I prefer stimulation lower down on my shaft while masturbating. Or maybe I just needed more practice. Anyway, the point is that after a few minutes the quality of the sensation really started to go down for me (even after adding more lube).

Another problem for me was that years of experience have taught my subconscious that the primary position in which to expect pleasure is lying face-down, and it turns out that that makes it difficult for me to really get into it while lying on my back/sitting up/etc. At least in my few bumbling attempts, I could not get the Egg to work in a face-down position. Again, it might be possible with practice, but it seemed pretty tricky for a first-timer.

On the up side, there is a tighter ring around the base of the Egg that does a pretty good job of keeping the lube from leaking out everywhere and making a mess, even if you are lying on your back. I guess if you were to actually cum inside it it would be even more useful but, as you might expect given all the negative stuff I've said so far, I didn't get to experience that for myself.

I sort of hate to rag on it so much, because the initial experience was pretty nice, and I'm sure with some practice you could keep that real-vagina-feeling going on for longer. But for me, at least, one of the best features of actual real vaginas is that they have women attached to them, so I think that even if I became an effective Egg user it still wouldn't quite do it for me.

A deal to make me squeal

2010-08-19T14:32:00.000-07:00

Today through Sunday, August 22 the website SocialBuy http://www.socialbuy.com/san-jose/ is offering a $20 voucher that is good for $40 worth of merchandise at the online store for Bliss Connection, the supplier of the products I review. I'm not getting a kickback from you purchasing this deal, but I am pretty excited about it myself. As if I don't have enough toys (perhaps it's like Pokemon and I've gotta catch 'em all), I plan on buying the deal and getting the Nea by Lelo that I've really been lusting after since I held it at the Pleasure Party last week.

My tingling clit

2010-08-17T21:45:00.000-07:00

I recently purchased a tube of Nympho's Desire, Arousal Balm from Bliss Connection after trying it at the pleasure party I hosted last week. I'll post more about the party later, but for now I'll just tell you about the party goers' experience with this cream. Chrystal, our lovely and informative "sexpert," left a tube of this "female viagra" in the bathroom during the party and encouraged us to try it discreetly during a little break. While we each put it on in private, it was hard to keep our reactions to ourselves. Perhaps many of us put on too much (a little drop goes a long way) but most of us certainly ended up with parties in our panties. One lady even had a 3 minute orgasm from this balm alone!

I tried it again last night after receiving my very own container in the mail. Just as before, it made my clitoris very cold, then slowly over the next few minutes it became warm and then vacillated between cold and hot while tingling.

What I hadn't tried before was sexual activity while enjoying this cream. I started with masturbating using my battery operated toys and quickly found that they were not enough. The tingling and temperature fluctuations were overpowering the vibration.

I went for my Hitachi Magic Wand knowing that if any vibration would be intense enough to do the trick, that'd be it. The buildup was gradual, 10 or so minutes longer than my regular 1-3 minutes before first orgasm. With the strong vibration, the extra time was a highly enjoyable treat. It wasn't the tedious kind of masturbation session where I'm aching for an orgasm the whole time, while deep down knowing nothing is gonna happen. Instead I felt a full of range arousing sensations the entire time. I was savoring the tingling, temperature and vibration that eventually made my sensually overwhelmed body explode in a whole body orgasm.

From there I moved onto sex, having visually stimulated my husband who had watched me "test" the new product. The movement of his penis inside me also felt less like the primary sensation. This truly is viagra for women, especially ones who cum quickly and are then done. I can certainly last longer (and be continually aroused) while using Nympho's Desire, which is a good thing for the times when my partner wants slow lovemaking. The effects seemed to last for 30-45 minutes for me. My only warning is that because this product contains mineral oil it is not condom safe, so if you use condoms, save this for other times.

And speaking of using Nympho's Desire at other times; if you see me smiling while shopping, walking down the street or hanging out at a party, perhaps I'm indulging in a panty party.

Diving In

2010-08-15T18:00:00.000-07:00

As I mentioned previously, I will be writing a fictional piece on the 15th of each month. The following is the first one.

All semester I'd been watching him. Sure, I watched him because I needed to learn the subject matter, but I looked at him in a different way too, a way that distracted me from really paying attention to history class.
I daydreamed. I thought about my fingers in his curly brown hair, about his eyes really looking at me (perhaps naked), about his hard chest under the fitted black t-shirt, having him smile at me like when I answered questions correctly. And those hands, god how I wanted them to touch me, caress me and grab my hips. I watched his hands fiddle with the chalk while he spoke.
Sometimes I would take a few extra minutes organizing and putting away notes and books on the off chance that he would talk to me - after everyone left. Other times I would have read an interesting little tidbit that was slightly relevant just so that I could have something history related to talk to him about after class for a minute or two. In these moments my heart beat faster and I felt warm and tingly. After leaving the classroom I would think about how silly and cliche it was for me to imagine doing anything with him - a professor who barely seemed to notice me other than my academic prowess, despite the low-cut blouses and short skirts I often wore to class.
Then something happened that made me crush crazy. I was at the swimming pool getting ready to leave after diving team practice. There he was at the edge of the pool, in a speedo! Oh my lord, what a body - not only was his chest built, he also had the chiseled indentations from his hipbones down to the clearly outlined, large package. I fumbled around in my bag for a minute, avoiding eye contact. I ducked back into the dressing room, acting as if I'd forgotten something. I stood against the cold metal locker, catching my breath and trying to think of what I could say to him. I was wet and looked like a drowned rat with my frumpy workout clothing on. Okay, I thought to myself, I'll just smile and wave, maybe say hi and walk out cooly.
I pulled the heavy door open quickly and confidently, ready to give a casual smile and walk back to my dorm. He was on the 3 meter diving board, facing away from me and my voyeuristic and hunk gazing instincts took over. While I had a clear chance to escape, I just stood there watching as he preparing for an inward or back dive.

He bounced on the board for what seemed like an eternity and then dove, a beautiful inward two-and-a-half. He emerged, brushing his hair back and I

instinctively applauded his splashless dive. He turned, and saw me halfway down the length of the pool. A smile spread on his lips. He ducked his head back into the water and swam away toward the ladder. I turned to walk out. "See you tomorrow morning" he called as he stood at the base of the diving board. "Okay" I replied as I waved over my shoulder. My heart pounded hard in my chest as I tried to walk slowly and nonchalantly.

That night I took a long shower, playing with myself and thinking of my hot speedo wearing professor. Naughty images of things that shouldn't happen between a nineteen year old girl and older man (I didn't know how old he was, maybe thirty five) danced in my head. I thought about him rummaging through the pile of papers on his desk after class, trying to find something related to what we were talking about and me bending over, pantiless, to pick up some papers that fell on the floor and him catching a glance as he walked behind me help pick up papers. I imagined asking if he'd like to touch after noticing a bulge forming in his pants. I closed my eyes and rubbed my hands over my body, tingling as I imagined my hands being his, on my neck, breasts, thighs and wet pussy. My breaths became short soft moans as this fantasy came to life in my mind. As I imagined him locking the door of the classroom and turning back toward me, I exploded. My head went from cold, to hot and fuzzy as warm, pulsating waves rippled through my vagina. I continued to replay that moment and the few seconds that might follow as he removed his shirt, until my legs and stomach felt heavy and ached with satisfaction and exhaustion.

To be continued...

All tied up

2010-08-14T14:52:00.001-07:00

We have been busy testing out the Beginner's Bondage Fantasy from Sportsheets, thanks to Bliss Connection. This beginner bondage set is just that, a comfortable (velvety textured restraints) and fun introduction. It comes with 4 wrist or ankle restraints (no difference between the two and one size does seem to fit all) and a blindfold. We have found them to be soft and durable, a well-made product.
We attached them onto our bedframe and after a little tussle over who was going to get strapped down, I found my wrists and ankles restrained. It reminded me of the time I mud-wrestled my husband in college and ended up above his head before being covered in mud. With the blindfold over my eyes I was in total darkness. As he started toying with my restrained body, I attempted to wiggle out of the bondage. Previously we had mainly used karate belts as restraints, and while they are functional, they are neither the most comfortable or challenging to get out of. This was completely different. I felt no pain where the straps rubbed and pulled, but I was totally unable to get free even though they appear to have basic velcro closures.
We had a great time with the change up in routine, my husband even used my vibrator on me - so intense without having control. And after I was released the sex was amazing. Having my senses back after the deprivation made everything so much more intense and enjoyable. A few days later I got to turn the tables and restrain my husband. He's not much of a bottom, but did a nice job letting me play with him - and once he was tied down he also couldn't break free.
This bondage set is a gentle, low cost way to try out restraints. It makes the experience as tame as petting a lion, soft as a kitty's fur, but impossible to escape from if the cat is hungry. Our only complaint is that the straps were a little on the short side, though I hear that if you don't have a bedframe, you can attach them to each other which would fix that problem. We will likely keep these attached to our bedframe for the foreseeable future (until our children ask us what they are) and use them from time to time to keep boredom from creeping into our sex life.

Naked in the Water

2010-08-10T23:35:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite places to go on Maui is Little Beach, a public nude beach I've been going to since I was a child, growing up on the island. I saw my first erect penis there, wandered upon my first sighting of oral sex (one man going down on another) and made out with my first boyfriend there. But aside from these sexual experiences I've enjoyed the freedom of swimming in the warm ocean water, naked and free.

As an adult I've gone to Little Beach with my husband many times - from a couple months after we started dating, to weekly when we lived there and now when we return on our annual visits. Our first sex on the beach experience was in the evening as we were heading home from Little Beach, the stars clearly visible above and the sound of the waves helped crank up the romance dial. Another time we brought a remote control vibrating g-string butterfly and my husband had fun buzzing my clit every so often with the touch of a button.

To get to this beach we park at the first Makena (Big Beach) parking lot, take a little walk down the beach to the big hill and make our way (up a rocky path) over to the other side. While it is a somewhat less well known beach for tourists, you can easily find it if you watch for the ant trail of people making the little trek, especially on Sunday afternoons/evenings. While Big Beach is known for its boogie boarding and dangerous wave breaks, Little Beach is calmer, being in a cove.

Calling this beach a hippie paradise would not be off-base with the open marijuana smoking, visible body hair, free love vibe and dreadlocks. But only about half the beach goers are topless or nude since this beach is also popular among surfers and boogie boarders who remain clothed and others who enjoy the nudity but don't participate.

Sunday afternoons are the most lively time at Little Beach and finding a slice of heaven can be a bit tricky. The beach is packed with people dancing, drumming, exercising, selling their wares or services (jewelry, ganga balls, pipes, chocolate shrooms, or massages) and relaxing.

We usually bring a picnic dinner and hang out, watching the sun slowly slip behind the water as the drumming reaches a furious climax. When darkness falls, the fire dancers emerge with their poi to spin - some get fancy using hula hoops, finger attachments or staffs with fire. The drummers play, the dancers and fire people move to the rhythm and others form a circle and watch, while lovers lay on towels in darkness enjoying the party and making out.

The bushes at the far end of the beach have a maze of trails, leading up to the an open area with an expansive view. These bushes are also a favorite sex location. I've seen numerous couples engaged in different sexual acts. The most recent time my husband and I saw a couple they were out on the rocks. The woman was giving the man oral sex. They stopped and waved at us and continued their act, probably knowing that the only people who go up there are either looking to engage in a sexual act or watch someone else.

Bad dream

2010-08-04T15:02:00.001-07:00

I was recently sent a new toy try, courtesy of Bliss Connection. The Lucid Dream #14 by Doc Johnson is a G-spot vibrator. I've never been a big fan of g-spot only toys, but hey, it's not a dildo, so it had the potential to vibrate my clit too if need be. It arrived in a beautiful clear plastic box with purple lettering and swirly designs. A sticker on the packaging stated that it is the "Women's Health winner - Best Maxi Vibe."
I excitedly removed the purple translucent toy from the box only to be overwhelmed by an awful, chemical, plastic smell. I could barely tolerate being in the same room with it, much less think of putting it in my vagina. I quickly took it to the sink and gave a very good long wash (it's waterproof) with soap and warm water. While the smell didn't go away, it did become fainter. While I waited for the smell to dissipate I did a little research. The outside of this toy is made with PVC vinyl - not exactly a chemical free material.
I washed and aired it out for a couple days then gave it a go. The twist speed dial (vs. a button) on the bottom has always been less satisfying to me as I like discreet speeds, but I figured it had the potential to still be decent if the vibration were intense. Unfortunately it had low to medium power.
The big bulbous head (1.5 inches in diameter definitely makes it a maxi vibe) was something I figured would satisfy me as I'm a size matters kind of gal, but it just didn't. The large and awkwardly long head, with a very skinny base just left me wondering what was going on, especially with the less than satisfying vibration. I also had difficultly holding it comfortably with penetration and turning the dial was nearly impossible while using it. But I do give it credit for being so quiet that even at full speed I wasn't always sure if it was on when inserted (they weren't lying about it being virtually silent).
Unfortunately, even when I gave up on using it as a g-spot vibrator and placed it on my clitoris I was left unfulfilled. The vibration is centered in the large angled bulb, below the tip. I got to the point of teasingly stimulating, kind of in the same way as bad oral sex, not enough to get me off, even after a desperately long 15 minutes.

Balancing on the blade

2010-08-03T23:19:00.000-07:00

The fine line between pleasure and pain does not seem to be one I frequently seek out or fantasize about. I find it hard to strike the right balance and too often I feel scared, physically hurt, or just a lack of enjoyment. I've been thinking about this recently because there are two such situations that I do delight in and both of them are in my recent past or near future.

The first is that on Friday I got another tattoo at my favorite tattoo parlor, Diving Swallow. It is an all-female tattoo cooperative in Oakland, California. It was be my fifth time getting tattooed. While this experience is not directly related sex, I do find tattoos to be sexy and I think the pain gives me a sort of high. That high may be related to me being thrilled by the end product but I think it also has something to do with the experience itself and the permanence of the act.

Getting tattooed is a unique kind of pain. The irritating pricking and dragging sensation just under the surface of the skin starts out feeling awful since the other times I have felt similar pain were the result of minor quick flesh wounds - getting scratched by a cat, caught against a rose bush or falling and scraping a hand or knee. But tattooing can last for hours. At some point a strange shift occurs. My mind overrides its previous pain memories and I no longer feel like I am being injured, instead just a little achy.

The other pain/pleasure experience I relish is spankings. The sensation of being paddled, whipped or slapped on my sufficiently padded bottom is great fun. I enjoy the initial jolt of fire and the resulting heat that spreads throughout my body. And when I can look back and see the visible pleasure on my spanker's face the experience is perfect.

During The Importance of Being Earnest photo book I was supposed to be spanked by the character Ms. Prism. I kept telling the woman to spank me harder in order for my facial expression to be authentic. She was becoming less comfortable and not having fun with the degree of force I was requesting so I asked if she would mind a stunt spanker stepping in. She said that was fine and my husband took over - giving me a right proper smack on the bottom with the required prop (a hairbrush).

Folsom Street Fair is the other public place I've been spanked. No, I've never taken part in the spanking booths (where you donate to a cause in exchange for a lashing on the back or rear end) though I'm not opposed to it. My spankings instead came from random people who had paddles, crops or an open palm and wanted to spank me upon seeing my different outfits (over the years) that usually showed off my booty. Thankfully they always asked permission first. Consent is an important part of what makes any intimate experience fun, especially one that flirts with the pain/pleasure line. And as I gave the go ahead, I clued them into the amount of force I desired. I also won a paddle and was given a little crop at Folsom, souvenirs of a fun-filled event. Both of these toys still make private appearances from time to time.

Games

2010-08-01T16:51:00.000-07:00

What stands out in my mind from that night was my husband (my new boyfriend at the time) and I looking at each other smiling as we (racing to make our partners orgasm) caused the other two people to cum simultaneously. Even though we were each touching other people, in that moment of eye contact he and I experienced the same thing - feeling the climax in a satisfying and intimate, mental and voyeuristic way. And while we quickly went home to achieve our own release, it was images of the hours before that flooded our thoughts.
The foursome had been the culmination of a long and fun night. There had been a rather large game of "I've Never" that over time morphed into "I Have" (with some participants going so far as to use items like "I have been licked off by 2 dogs simultaneously"). This game worked amazingly as the group of people meshed well and continuously upped the ante with regard mentioning kinky experiences.
After a couple hours we switched to playing Truth or Dare. The timing was perfect. We had gotten bored of yes/no questions only, had learned enough about each other to know that we could give (and take) some solid dares and still had the option to inquire about previously mentioned experiences by asking truths.
I remember one of the first dares involving me and 2 other ladies kissing for a few minutes. The ways to approach this dare seemed limitless. But instead of kissing in sets, all three soft female mouths instinctively came together, tongues exploring, sweet tastes mixing. It felt amazing and our audience must have enjoyed it too as it was soon followed up by a dare involving the same people and same act, only this time topless. We were once again kissing, caressing each other's breasts and before the dare was over, kissing each others breasts as well.
The continued theme revolved around women kissing - my lucky husband was dared to go into the bathroom with 3 ladies (one of them being me) and make out with the lights off. This sensory experience was amazingly tantalizing - getting to know each other through taste and touch. Each little breath and caress sending tingles throughout our bodies. Eventually someone knocked on the door, eager for us to come out and continue the game (and perhaps slightly jealous of our private experience).
Slowly people trickled out of the room as the hours went by. The last four of us that remained (my ex-boyfriend whose room the game had been in), a cute Asian girl who I didn't really know but had the pleasure of getting to make out with during the evening, my husband and I, were all aroused and tingling with the building sexual tension in the room.
She and I made out for a little while, the only sounds in the room being our little moans of pleasure and short excited breaths of our male onlookers. Eventually we broke off, each kissing one of the guys and then switching. We moved from the floor to the twin bed, quickly losing clothing, arms and legs intertwined on the small surface, hands groping bodies, feeling warm flesh and finding fascinating similarities and differences from one body to the next. Without thought or discussion, our mouths followed our hands, kissing the necks, breasts, chests, stomachs and thighs that our fingers had explored. Excitement peaked as we got to wet and eager genital areas. Thighs quivered, hips bucked and our breath momentarily left us.
Our fingers and mouths diligently went to work, learning what worked best. We experimented watching and listening for a response, returning to the touch, lick or stroke that made our recipients go wild. Perhaps because my husband and I both enjoy giving a hand job or oral sex more than receiving it, we ended up there gazing at each other, pleasure dancing in our eyes as we furiously raced to provide orgasms. It was exhilarating to watch each other do something we had only experienced as recipients, as well as having the satisfaction of making someone orgasm and watching two people climax at the same time as the result of separate acts. The whole energy in the room had been building and the four of us had been able to ride the wave together though we were participating differently. At the peak a euphoria washed over us. We lay there, sweaty, warm bodies, comfortable and spent in a serene and happy silence that rarely occurs when four people are together.

And now for something new...

2010-07-31T10:34:00.000-07:00

Starting in August I will be writing two new types of posts. These tantalizing little tales will a monthly feature. On the 1st of every month I'll depict factual experiences I've had and on the 15th I'll tease you with a work of fiction relating to my fantasies. I hope you enjoy.

Unusual places

2010-07-29T23:20:00.000-07:00

Spicing up my sex life can sometimes be as easy as finding a daring place to have sex. Here's my top 10 list of places where I've done the deed:
1) In an elevator
2) In a library
3) In a classroom
4) On the sidewalk
5) At the top of a waterfall
6) In a friend's backyard
7) In the projection booth of a theater
8) On the beach
9) In a sex club
10) And of course ...in bed.

Feel free to share some of yours.

Stormy Leather

2010-07-25T23:29:00.000-07:00

I have been to Stormy Leather in San Francisco on two occasions and both times came away with exactly what I wanted. Once I bought Liquid Latex there and the other time I purchased a corset. Both times I walked around the Castro with a particular product in mind but without having success after visiting numerous store.
Stormy Leather was located off the main drag - a block or two from Folsom Street where many of the leather stores are located. I say "was located" because I just found out yesterday (when admiring a corset that happened to be from Stormy Leather) that they completed a 20 year lease, have closed up shop and will be moving to a more desirable location (still in San Francisco) in the fall. They were also recently purchased by JT Stockroom (a reputable company).
Since the store was not as centrally located, our searches began on Folsom Street and grew in radius until we ended up at Stormy. When we were purchasing the latex paint the sales lady simply reached down, pulled out the colors they had, we chose the ones we wanted, bought them and left. It was a great experience, simple and straightforward. If only we had started our search there. Several stores didn't have any liquid latex, one store just had an expired jar that when opened was congealed and another couple stores had only one color. So while our feet hurt and we were tired, we went home happy.
Sadly we hadn't searched the vast inventory of the store, making it only to the check out counter, or we might have known 2 years later (when I wanted a corset) that we should revisit Stormy Leather. We did a little research online and found a few stores that had corsets in the under $400 range in the Folsom Street area. We visited 3 stores with poor results. The first and second didn't have any corsets I liked (mostly mens' leather stuff) and the third place had horrible customer service and none of the corsets seemed to fit right or look great (possibly because we had no help lacing them or because they were just not appealing to me).
When we arrived at Stormy the sales people were once again very helpful, quickly ascertaining what size and styles I might want. I was presented with 5 corsets to try on. When we quickly demonstrated our ineptitude with lacing up a corset one of the salesmen came over. "You just pull the laces like this" he said showing my husband "and then when you have them even you just get a little leverage (putting his knee against my back) and pull." With a little athleticism he got that corset cinched so nice and snug that I had a small waist, big hips and an overflowing bosom. I tried on numerous corsets but I had found love at first sight.
I am eager to return to Stormy leather when they reopen. Until then I will lustfully peruse their website making note of all the things I want (for example Terra Firma Harness and the Sergeant Corset). They seem to be a store with amazing selection, a friendly and knowledgeable staff and no sleazy vibe.

Public nudity

2010-07-23T23:18:00.000-07:00

When I first found out that there was an organized group of people who ran naked through San Francisco for the Bay to Breakers 12k run I was excited. I couldn't believe that I could run through the city and not get arrested. Actually, the law in San Francisco does not make nudity a criminal offense anywhere other than in Golden Gate Park, and while the race goes through the park, as long as you stay on the road you are not considered to be in the park itself.

My husband and I signed up for Bare to Breakers group and were given instructions for where to meet for the members only pre-race meeting. We met in a conference room of a large hotel. There people were clothed most of the time though at times stripping off all their clothes to apply sunscreen or tie on their race number. After some preparation and chit chat, there was a short talk by the organizer describing proper etiquette (no lewd behavior) and encouraging people to hand out beads and balloons (though not in exchange for Mardi Gras style flashing). After that we divided into 2 groups - runners and walkers - and headed out toward the starting line. When we reached the street where we were going to start the race we stripped down to the bare essentials - tennis shoes, neon yellow hats, beads around our neck and balloons in hand. The woman standing next to me had painted on her stomach Say No To Bush, and as you may have guessed she had no pubic hair having recently started laser hair removal.

The run was exhilarating. People were yelling and cheering for me. There were a few guys who ran alongside videotaping (a little creepy) and others who had looks of shock on their faces (but give me a break, this is San Francisco - a naked couple is certainly not the craziest thing I've seen on the street).

Speaking of being a naked couple, there was one woman we passed who screamed "Rock out with your cock out, Jam out with your clam out!" But most people were not so keen on seeing a naked man. Perhaps it's because the naked men outnumbered the women 10:1 or perhaps it's because many of the nude males were not attractive. There were definitely some attractive naked men, and I found it sad that even those men got heckled.

We ran naked 3 years in a row and each time walked back (the whole 12k) along the course since we completed the race before all rowdy, costumed people and floats. This allowed us to enjoy the run and the party. Then after 2 years off (we had conflicting plans) we returned this past May. But we had heard (incorrectly, it turned out) that the Bare to Breakers group had disbanded so we ran on our own. We did not run naked (which was nice at the starting line since it was freezing cold, even with a hot Starbucks coffee in hand) but I ran in a tiny dress and my husband ran in a t-shirt and utili-kilt. We did not wear anything under our minimal coverage and had fun flashing people along the course. At one point there was a group of about 10 guys behind a fence watching the race, I flashed them and they went wild rattling their cage and barking. But I believe the funniest moment was when we were walking back along the course and we heard a guy we were passing comment "I can't believe that dude is naked" about someone walking in the race. My husband responded with "this is the first time we done it clothed." The man laughed in disbelief, to which my husband and I simultaneously lifted our skirts. His jaw dropped and we walked away laughing - just another fun day in San Francisco.

Sexercise

2010-07-20T21:05:00.000-07:00

In training for a half marathon I've been thinking about what exercises are important for toning and increasing endurance. It got me thinking about how sex is an athletic activity and how if you are in sexually good shape it feels better and is more fun. Talking about this makes me feel like I'm writing a tagline on the cover of some women's magazine "Ten Ways to Trim, Tone and Have the Sex Life You've Always Wanted." But aside from the cheesiness factor, I do think it's important to do the work necessary to have a really good sex life. When I'm happier in bed, I'm happier out of bed. And so is my husband.
So here's my top 10 ways I sexercise:
1) Kegels (I have thought about getting vaginal weights to increase the toning, but haven't done it yet)
2) Stretching (being flexible is always sexy)
3) Doing aerobic exercise (endurance makes sex better)
4) Strength training (being able to lift your partner is a plus)
5) Reading up (finding new ways to make sex more exciting)
6) Mental exercise (being creative with what you've got and role playing)
7) Masturbation (works for keeping my sex drive up and PC muscles toned)
8) Sexy dancing (good as foreplay and exercise)
9) Having sexual experiences with multiple people (helps with teaching me new sexercises)
10) Sex! It's the ultimate form of sexercise if done for 30 minutes or more and with regularity.

Sexual role models

2010-07-18T23:05:00.000-07:00

How could I have a positive view of sex when I grew up in a family where sexual activity was looked down upon?
When I was a child, my parents (especially my mom) talked about how sex was a marital obligation, but how if you had a really strong marriage you didn't need sex. My mom had made my dad remain abstinent for 2 years (early in their relationship) to "help make their marriage be about something more than base desires." She said that the mouth was a clean place not meant for the penis, and forget about anal sex. Here favorite comment regarding the anus and vagina is "why would God put a garbage dump right next to an amusement park?" The first time I ever saw my parents kiss with a little tongue action I was a teenager. My dad had been given a Kama Sutra style book and tried out one of the kisses with my mom to which my mom jumped back and said something about it not being appropriate.
Luckly, while my mom presented me with this bizarre and anti-sexuality view of the world we lived in a commune like setting. I was able to see that while my parents had some strange beliefs they certainly were not the views of all my friends' parents. Many of the adults I grew up around were on the other extreme of sexuality. They were free love hippies. They practiced Tantric Sex/Yoga, talked freely about sexuality, walked around naked and had noisy sex at night.
I remember one of my friend's mom and step-dad teaching her weekly lessons about tantric sex (they were both tantra instructors) when she was around 8. Not in perverted way (not with any demonstration) but in a really liberal here is some information you should know to help make your sexual experiences better when you are older way. I did sit in on a couple of those lessons which were informative.
Also, I had another friend whose mom talked about her sex life frequently. It was through her explicit depictions of what made for a good sexual partner and a good sexual experience that I had some idea of what to look for and try when I got older. I was very curious since this stuff wasn't talked about at home, and I asked my friend's mom questions like "how do you give a good blowjob?" to which I got a detailed reply involving saliva, positions of hands, use of tongue and humming. This grossed out my friend as we were both around 12 but seemed entirely necessary to me.
The path that I have taken regarding sexuality is very different from that of my mom. I'm open, eager and embracing of sexual energy in myself and others. So why is my mom the way she is? It certainly wasn't her mom's doing. My grandma was fond of dirty jokes and freely answered my sex related questions (and though she also believed sex was for marriage, she had engaged in premarital sex).
The conclusion I have come to is that my mom does not get pleasure out of sex (she has said so herself) and she was messed up from her first marriage where her husband had taken on another wife (I don't know how it, as she says, "just happened"). In her mind the new wife forced her out of the marriage. The other woman had a daughter and my mom has always claimed that she left because she couldn't be part of messing up the child. I think she expressed her negative attitude in order to scare us into not having premarital sex so that we wouldn't get pregnant or acquire STDs.
I don't think of my more sexually open lifestyle is a form of rebellion. I think that it's just part of me being authentic to my own desires and belief in feminism. I hope to raise my daughters to not be ashamed of masturbating or secretive about their sexuality. I want them to know about their bodies (perhaps not as explicitly as the parents of my friends in the commune) but they will certainly own a copy of Our Bodies, Ourselves as teenagers and can feel free to ask me any questions. They will also most certainly grow up with parents who show public displays of their affection with each other.

Learning to pet the pussy

2010-07-16T00:14:00.000-07:00

I think I was about 13 or 14 the first time I happened upon orgasming. It wasn't as if I trying to get off, though without my knowledge I was masturbating. I was at a hotel pool and had gotten near a jet of water and suddenly the directed intense stream of water made me feel really good. I stayed there for a few minutes and the feeling got even more intense until it climaxed and was done.
I made no connection between what I was doing and masturbating since masturbating in my mind meant touching my genitals directly. I continued to do my pool pleasuring whenever I went to a pool or hot tub, perhaps 2-4 times a year, being as discreet as possible.
I didn't try masturbating, as I defined it (since my mom seemed to discourage it) until my freshman year of college. In the all female college I went to the women talked about everything and there was plenty of talk about sex and masturbating. So I decided to try it. I was laying in my bed (the upper bunk) after my roommate had fallen asleep one night and I tried masturbating using my finger. It took a REALLY long time - maybe an hour and a half. When I finally orgasmed my first thought was "wow this is the same as what I was doing in the pool," and almost immediately after that I thought "why do people do it with their fingers when it was so much easier with the water."
The next day I did a little research on the internet. I found that people masturbate with many objects (yes, I know I was uninformed). I tried using the shower since it was the closest thing to the pool. It worked great except that the showers were all communal in the dorm where I lived. I scoped out the other dorms and found a bathroom that while communal only had one tub/shower and I was able to lock the door. This became my escape.
However, using the other shower was a big production. I had to bring shower supplies to another dorm, clean the tub and find off hours when no one who lived in the dorm, ready to give me weird or annoyed stares as I left (yes the school was small enough that everyone knew everyone who lived in or dated someone in that dorm) would be waiting to use the same shower.
I decided to attempt some of the other masturbation techniques I'd seen on the internet. I tried sitting on the washing machine - nothing, I tried laying on my stomach and rubbing on a smooth rock - nothing. So I kept showering. Then when I was at home over winter break my mom gave me a new head to my Sonicare toothbrush. I remembered having seen that mentioned on the internet so I took the old head and tried it out - so simple, so perfect, so fast. I was able to use it in my dorm room when I returned to college as long as my roommate was gone. It was a little noisy - but hopefully just sounded like a long toothbrushing session.
While my methods of masturbating have changed over time and my understanding of my own anatomical preferences has grown I still have the same reaction to a climax that I did that first time. Sometimes I still use the shower or Sonicare toothbrush if I'm horny and far from my toys. I also learned that while boys like to watch me use my fingers it just isn't worth the effort unless it's for show - and then if they want to see me cum I'll grab my Magic Wand or Butterfly Kiss and finish the job.

I wanna get in your hot tub baby

2010-07-11T21:34:00.000-07:00

Have you ever thought about what heaven could be like? I believe my heaven would be something like being at Watercourse Way. It has a calming Zen feel from the moment you walk through the door - Asian inspired decor, soft music, and soothing smells. The outside world disappears at the doorstep and while you wait to be escorted to your room there is ice cold water or hot teas for sipping.
The first time my husband suggested we go to this bath house a completely different image popped up in my mind. I thought of San Francisco and the "Soak and Pokes" that were the fame of the gay community in the 1980s. Watercourse Way, however, does not have a tawdry feel. It is an upscale, clean, and professional establishment that is as good for a single individual or a group of friends as it is for couples. They offer tub rooms, massage, and spa services.
I decided I should post a review of this little known gem after a visit this past Saturday. My husband I and go every 2-3 months to play in their rooms. We usually book a room with a hot tub, sauna or steam room and cold plunge. We've been to all of the 5 rooms that have these features and they are all marvelous. This time we called at the last minute and got the room Two Stones. It did not have a cold plunge but the hot tub had a beautiful waterfall flowing into it and was big enough for 10 people.
We also got their couples massage package on one occasion. I enjoyed how my husband and I were together throughout the whole experience - the steam room/shower, the exfoliating rub and the side by side massages. Other places we've been to separated us for part of the time. And they use hot rocks as part of their massage--such nirvana.
Our favorite tub room is Six Dragonflies. It has a tub, cold plunge and sauna. The tub and cold plunge are made out of wood (perhaps cedar) that smells really good. All of the rooms have controls for the music, lights, amount of steam or temperature of sauna and an intercom with the front desk. The doors also lock automatically so there's no chance of intrusion from the outside world. Six Dragonflies also has a skylight that makes it ideal for a daytime escape from reality. Did I mention that all of the tub rooms also have a bed for, um, resting?
We went there once on a date with another couple and boy was that great! The feeling of being in a different world, one free of responsibilities, worries and full of romantic mood lubricants made for a fun and relaxed time. We had the tub room Nine Bats, a crowd favorite with glowing jellyfish on the wall and twinkling stars on the ceiling. That was seriously the best make out session ever! I think I had the after-sex glow for days.

Slippery when wet

2010-07-10T23:34:00.000-07:00

As a woman, being dry down there isn't sexy. But wait, what if you're dry from hours of wild sex? Now that's hot, right? Or at least acceptable.
I do admit that there are times I've needed a little lube. Breastfeeding has tended to make matters worse. I tried a number of different lubricants before finding the one that I absolutely love. In fact, I love it so much that I use it sometimes even when it's not completely necessary.
I've used lubrication that was too sticky, another that didn't keep me wet for long, and one kind that left behind dry white crusty pieces afterward. Yuck, yuck and yuck. Not to mention the smell and taste of some lubes.
I wanted something that just felt like my own natural wetness - slippery and smooth with no smell or taste. The lube that met these qualifications is called Liquid Silk. It is water-based, so you can use it with latex condoms or toys without risk of harming them. The lack of glycerin also makes it good for those ladies who get yeast infections from lubricants.
It has little enough smell and taste that it does not hamper oral sex for even a minute. It also doesn't stain so you can go wild and it washes right out. And after the act is done it soaks right into the skin like a silky smooth moisturizer - and why not treat your most delicate parts to a little lotion every now and again?

Gettin' rude with the food

2010-07-08T22:19:00.000-07:00

Dear readers,
While you wait with baited breath for me to receive, play with and post reviews of my new toys, you can use the coupon code LEXI for 15% off at Bliss Connection to get some toys for yourselves. Perhaps we can be simultaneously orgasming. The chances are greater if we are both playing with ourselves or our friends. They also pay shipping on purchases over $25.
Then you won't have use a cucumber.

Earnest in bed

2010-07-07T22:43:00.000-07:00

You know how fortune cookie sayings are always better if you add "in bed" to the end of them? Well what if you applied that same principle to an Oscar Wilde play? Several years ago an acquaintance-by-reputation of mine decided to explore that idea, and sent out a casting call for a softcore photocomic (or as those in the know would say, a "fumetti") of The Importance of Being Earnest. The idea was to bring any real or imagined sexual innuendos to the surface, and make good porn.

My husband and I auditioned to be two of the main characters and were soon getting measured for elaborate costumes she was making. The people initially cast as the other two main characters were individuals that she had found through craigslist. While I had no particular problem with them, the idea of touching their genitals and them touching mine, as the FAQ for the project stated, was less than exciting. That problem solved itself over the next few months as they both dropped out of the project for different reasons. While this left our fearless leader without two main characters, she was able to wrangle up a married couple of her friends at the last minute. These individuals were not close friends of mine, but I knew who they were (we went to college together), and found them both to be attractive.

The project was shot over three weekends. I was nervous about my intimate scenes and of course the girl/girl scene was the first thing shot on the first day. We started with a couple pictures of us sitting close together and then it was right into kissing and then heading down south. What a first day, and what an introduction to this woman who I had only met in passing before this project. Amazing how a week later I would have considered her and her husband great friends--and probably more.

The second week I was barely in the shoot so I got to spend time hanging out, helping with makeup, and watching my husband and the other main man make out. It was so hot! Exactly the stuff my fantasies are made of. I also spent time on the front steps smoking cloves with the other woman and talking, which ended up being one of my fondest memories.

By the third weekend everyone was very comfortable with each other. We had a sleepover between the two nights of photographing on location, at the makeup artist's house (which was also the set for the shoot that weekend). I was no longer nervous about the sexual scenes as I had been in the beginning. In fact, I wished I could do that first day over so it could look better and be more fun to do.

I did get to get spanked , masturbate, and have sex for the camera that third weekend. And I got to watch titillating scenes with others who were comfortable with me watching. I was sad to have it end, but I was also exhausted. We had been shooting from early morning to sundown and that last weekend had been so hot. I had been dressed in victorian clothing (when I wasn't naked) and all the layers (including a tight corset) in the hundred plus degree heat gave me a real live case of "the vapors" on our final day of shooting. The vapors are often thought of as a woman swooning against the side of a couch, a symptom of hysteria. And as I just read, were sometimes treated by use of a vibrator under the care of a doctor. And did you know vibrators were available as household electronics nine years before vacuum cleaners? Beautiful!

Ok, so back to the vapors. I started acting weird - saying I was dizzy, hot and laughing a lot. Then I tried to pull myself together but kept feeling funny, and finally passed out. Everyone quickly helped get my corset loose and all my clothes off. I've never been undressed so fast or by so many people. I felt better almost immediately and did not require the care of a vibrator carrying doctor.

The end of the photoshoot also meant the end of dating the other couple since they returned to their home in a different state. This may have been the saddest part, as ends of relationships (as I then thought it would be) make me melancholy. But the relationship has not fully ended and the friendship has continued to grow. Also, now that The Importance of Being Earnest is in print I can look my copy whenever I want to see all of the exciting on-camera things that happened that summer.

Coochy all over me

2010-07-02T22:47:00.000-07:00

With a name like Coochy I was worried that it would be a gimmicky novelty item and was certainly hoping it wouldn't smell like its namesake. Luckily I found that this rash free shaving cream was just a poorly named unisex product with several good uses. When I posted to this blog about getting laser hair removal because I disliked shaving or waxing my bikini area, Chrystal at Bliss Connection immediately asked me if I'd ever tried Coochy shaving cream. I responded that I hadn't but was certainly game for trying it. She kindly sent me a bottle.
I hadn't gone bare floors in over four years so I was both excited and reticent. It always looked nice at first, but I hated how it itched and caused ingrown hairs when it was coming back. I followed the detailed instructions for best results and shaved off my landing strip. The area was so nice and smooth, a really close shave. Then I waited for the itchies, but they never came. Also I didn't get any ingrown hairs. I was very pleasantly surprised.
My husband manscaped using the shaving cream and while he did have the itching with hair regrowth, he did not get any ingrown hairs. So he tried it while shaving his facial hair - a place he always gets ingrown hairs - and guess what, no ingrown hairs.
I shaved my armpits and legs with this stuff too and got one of the smoothest full body shaves I've ever experienced. Then I used it as aftershave lotion as the bottle suggested (it has aloe vera in it) and was left with moisturized and nice smelling skin - it comes in several different scents or fragrance free. I used the original kind which, while I enjoyed the smell, could certainly be obnoxious to some people since it seems to remain noticeable throughout the day.
On the bottle it also suggests using it as a hair conditioner, so for the sake of research I decided to use it instead of my regular conditioner. I'll admit, I felt a little weird putting something called Coochy on my head. What if my boss or the cashier at the grocery store said "your hair smells nice, what are you using on it?" It's not as if I could just say Coochy. I decided I'd just tell them the name of the shampoo I use and leave my Coochy out of the discussion.
It turns out that it actually is a pleasant conditioner. It gave my hair more body and left it feeling smooth but not slippery. After all these uses I still have 90% of the bottle left, so a little does go a long way. I don't know how this stuff can do so many things but I guess that's just the way of the Coochy.

Workin' the pole

2010-06-28T23:36:00.000-07:00

I've been to many strip clubs. Not the most common place for a (fairly straight) woman to enjoy going but I find them to be intriguing and fun. I even celebrated my 22nd birthday at a strip club. I delight in the excitement, the naughtiness, the power shift between women and men. Over time I became curious about what happened behind the scenes - who chose the music, costumes, what was the dressing room like, were the ladies as friendly as they acted, how did they learn they learn pole tricks?
To answer these questions I decided I needed to get some first hand behind the scenes experience. I auditioned on a Tuesday evening (amateur night) at a local, fully nude strip club. I called in advance and was told just to bring one outfit, shave or wax fully, and they would choose music for me.
I looked up some basic stripper dos and don'ts on the internet. I arrived in my normal clothes, went to the dressing room to get dressed and do my own hair and makeup. The DJ (a large and friendly guy) gave my a choice of songs and honestly I can't remember which 2 I chose. I was so nervous. The other rules that the DJ told me were to be topless by the end of the first song and naked at the beginning of the second song and look like I was having the best time of my life.
And truthfully I did have a good time. The nerves pretty much all went away once I got up on stage. Being the amateur girl all eyes were on me like I was a virgin. I felt so powerful. I was above all these men who desperately wanted to touch me, but couldn't (the city law was that they had to be at least 18 inches away). I felt more confident in my physical appearance than I ever had since everyone was looking at me adoringly.
At the end of my 2 songs I went back to the dressing room with the $70 or so dollars I had made for 5-6 minutes of fun. Wow. The manager asked me if I would like to work there and I said yes right away.
I got put on the schedule to work Saturday day shift 11am to 7pm. It certainly wasn't the best shift but it was something and that was all I was really looking for, a glimpse inside.
I worked that shift and a few others here and there, as well as at the bikini bar owned by the same people for somewhere between 4-5 months. I learned a lot and still revel in an opportunity to either strip or pole dance, but not as a job. Here is my top 10 review of the good and bad things from the experience.

Good -
1) I got to buy lots of new sexy clothes and shoes.
2) I felt the most powerful and dominant I have ever felt in my life.
3) I saw a 4 month pregnant stripper (visibly pregnant) make all the men drool with her baseball cap routine (she'd borrow a baseball cap from one of the men, dance with it, put it all over her body and then return it).
4) I learned how to dance like a stripper - some of the girls taught me moves and I learned by watching.
5) I earned quite a bit of fairly easy money.
6) I got to listen to and dance to my favorite music.
7) I got to take on a new persona.
8) I learned how to give myself a full Brazilian (bikini waxing). I didn't want to pay for one every few weeks for 1 day a week of work.
9) I got to dance for friends as well as strangers.
10) I was able to leave when I decided I'd had enough without being jobless or broke.

Bad -
1) The club was supposedly owned by the Croatian mafia. What I knew for sure was that it was run by unkind and condescending men.
2) Most of the other strippers were using cocaine or meth.
3) Many of the strippers were rude and catty - if you used the genre of music they used, if you talked to customers while they were on stage, if you looked at them.
4) The management yelled at the strippers if a customer ever touched a stripper - not really something a stripper could control (though understandably bad as the club could lose its license).
5) Men harassed and waited for strippers outside of the club.
6) Many of the women used the regulars to get outside benefits - they would have the men take them shopping, pay their rent or buy them cars (often with nothing more given than a chance to hang out).
7) I was always bruised everywhere from the hard wooden stage and the pole.
8) There was always some sort of bodily fluid on the stage or poles - sweat? saliva? vaginal fluid?
9) I had to be friendly and animated and act interested even when the customers were exceedingly boring.
10) While customers could not touch the strippers, they blew on them throughout stage performances, in an attempt to make them feel they were interacting in some physical way. Not sexy and not fun.

A Butterfly Kiss takes my breath away

2010-06-25T21:40:00.000-07:00

When I received my newest sex toy, the Butterfly Kiss, I thought it looked juvenile - the MyLittlePony of vibrators. With baby blue flexible silicone (it also comes in pink), a butterfly perched atop and hearts on the base, I would have imagined it to be called The Abstainer and given to teenagers to prevent premarital sex.
My expectations were also low because I don't typically care for penetration and clitoral stimulation at the same time. I usually don't even enjoy sex while using a vibrator, asking my husband not to move at all on the occasions when we try clitoral vibration with sex (resulting in a softer and unhappy husband). This vibrator also looked wimpy to me, being powered by only 2 AAA batteries versus my favored plug in vibrator.
But that's where I stopped being under-impressed. The people who made this vibrator must have really considered all aspects of the female anatomy, or at least created it with my anatomy and pleasure in mind. The butterfly itself has two wings and two antenna that flutter/buzz on the sides of the clitoris and a middle section (back of the butterfly) that is ribbed for her pleasure and can sit right against the clitoris. The shaft/penetrating part of the vibrator has an enlarged and somewhat egg-shaped end that fits inside the vagina and creates intense stimulation when thrust in and out. The fact that it has 3 different settings and that they really are low, medium and high was wonderful. The low is very mellow and the high is enough for even me, the Hitachi Magic Wand fiend.
After the 5th orgasm in less than 10 minutes I was giddy. This toy is amazing. It would fit in my handbag. I could bring it on vacation with me...oh how I'd love a weekend getaway with friends, lovers, or just me and my Butterfly Kiss.
But back to reality, I can't think of anyone who wouldn't enjoy this wonderful toy. Did I mention it's also waterproof? It can be an amazingly stimulating dildo if you don't want the vibration, or a clitoral vibrator only if you don't insert the shaft. But the way that it works together is mindblowing. My two best orgasm triggers (clitoral stimulation and the head of a penis sliding in and out) were put together in a more intense and breathtaking way than I had ever imagined. One downside of the previous g-spot and clitoral vibrators I've had was that I could either vibrate the clit or thrust them in and out, but because of how bendable this shaft is, I am able to just rock it back and forth while keep the butterfly on target the entire time. Also, the more orgasms I have the tighter my vagina gets and the tighter my vagina gets the better the head of the shaft feels - talk about positive reenforcement.
And this is truly a budget vibrator. I will satisfy myself daily and happily buy a new one when I run this one into the ground (but it may be awhile if I can get 5 orgasms in under 10 minutes).

X marks the spot

2010-06-22T13:59:00.000-07:00

The first time I saw someone get a piercing I almost passed out. I'm not talking about the little piercing gun for ear piercing, but rather the needle they use at piercing parlors. I watched the needle go through the skin above her belly button and decided I would never get any piercing other than the one I already had in each ear.

A little less than a year later I had gotten my own navel pierced. I guess I wanted to conquer my fears. I also watched my sister get a few other piercings (her tragus and an industrial) in the cartilage of her ear. At the time she was dating the owner of a piercing parlor so I decided to get another piercing - a helix piercing (also ear cartilage).

I thought both of my body piercings were great. They made me feel a little more edgy, but in a very benign way. The only downside to them was how long they took to heal. My navel was back to normal after 6 months but the cartilage of my ear took 2-3 years before it was completely healed. In those lengthy healing periods I repeatedly considered taking out the piercings, but I had taken so long working up to getting each that I stubbornly kept them in.

But when my sister told me (5-7 years later) that she was going to get her clitoral hood pierced and wanted me to get it done with her, I was a bit wary. I didn’t want to risk having a long healing period down there. I also remembered hearing stories in college, once firsthand, but usually second or thirdhand about how getting the piercing led to near-constant arousal and uncontrolled orgasms. It sounded nice to be easily stimulated but what about when I was at work or spending time with my parents - not exactly the kind of thing I wanted to have no control over. So I told my sister I'd have to do some research.

I learned that while getting the clitoris itself pierced was more likely to lead to the above mentioned outcomes, even that was likely an exaggeration or simply because the people who were telling these stories had just gotten their piercings (since there is often more sensitivity in the first few days).

After a couple months I told my sister I was game. Somewhere in there I also made my husband a deal (since he was excited for me to get the piercing) that if I got it done, he would get a frenum (underside of the penis) piercing.

So we all went together to the piercing parlor. I remember the piercing itself hurting horribly and feeling a little faint afterwards. The three of us agreed right away that our piercings gave us increased sensation. That sensation decreased as I got used to the feeling of the ball hovering over my clit. But it continues to be the magical x on the treasure map of find my clit and play with it. And best of all it healed quickly! Within 3 weeks it was completely healed.

My husband was not so lucky. His ring frequently got caught on his boxers with painful repercussions, made masturbating uncomfortable and never completely healed. So after 5 years he removed it. I was sad to lose the added stimulation during sex but happy for him not to be in pain anymore.

I love my clitoral hood piercing and would recommend it a low maintenance female piercing with the benefits of being nice to look at, fun for self-play and an easy aide for others interested in pleasuring you.

Doin' it doggy style

2010-06-20T23:28:00.000-07:00

I received the Doggy Style Harness courtesy of Bliss Connection last week and have been doing my best to test it thoroughly in bed. The harness is an unassuming black piece of webbing with loops on the ends that can be loosened or tightened. The middle section of the harness is wider and softer, and thank goodness it is, since that it’s the part that rubbed against my abdomen while it was being pulled.

My husband and I tried the harness multiple times and do not find it to be something we will incorporate into our everyday sex lives. This does not mean that we won’t use it from time to time, but it just wasn’t the best toy for us.

After figuring out exactly how to position the harness, and using it for a couple minutes, I literally grabbed my husband’s hands and placed them on my hips. I crave as much skin-to-skin contact during sex as possible and he enjoys it too, readily grabbing even my more jiggly bits.

I can understand how some women might prefer not to be touched directly on their love handles, and for those women, this harness may make them feel more comfortable and sexy during lovemaking. After all, this one of the big selling points on the packaging. Also, if the man has a large stomach that makes reaching the woman’s hips challenging, this could be the toy that makes doggy style a fun position again.

One really great aspect of the harness is that it allowed my husband to be more rough and fast with his thrusting, without it being uncomfortable both on my hips (where his hands would have grabbed) and inside my vagina. Sometimes with deep penetration I feel pain from his penis against my cervix, but this didn’t happen while we were using the harness. I can’t explain why it was pain-free, but am guessing that it was related to the harness changing the angle of penetration. Also, the harness made it so that I didn’t have to do anything at all (freeing me up to play with myself).

After doing our due diligence in doggy style, we were ready to take the harness off-road. I was able to strap my arms and legs in a variety of positions, making the harness reminiscent of basic bondage gear – though the webbing was not always the most comfortable on wrists and ankles (my husband found this to be an issue even when used in the recommended position). It could be nice if you are unsure of whether your partner would be up for trying bondage. Buying a harness advertised for doggy style would be a very minimal pressure way to introduce the concept to your partner: “hey honey I bought this doggy style harness and oh, look, you can also tie me to the bed with it.” Though if you really want an introduction to bondage, a beginner’s bondage kit might be a better choice.

On the box there was a suggestion that the woman use the harness around the man in missionary position. When we tried this it did give me a bit more control over the rhythm, but kept sliding up his back, which decreased my domination and ended with me tossing it off the bed and going back to business as usual.

Overall, I found this toy to be a bit of bedroom spice, something fun to add for variety, but not what I’d use in my daily life. I tend to be a missionary girl, and while I enjoy other positions, I know which one will get be off fastest, strongest and most often. It did seem to make doggy style more fun, so if you or your partner loves doggy style it may be worth the investment.

Sexy down there

2010-06-19T15:36:00.000-07:00

Some people keep their private parts private. I think this is fine. It's not as if I go flaunting mine everyday. But private doesn't have to mean unattended to. I have learned how to accessorize and beautify that area, just as I do with the rest of my body.
With the dawn of the feminist movement women seemed to learn how to enjoy their vaginas in a sexual and natural sensual manner. But what if women want to adorn their vaginas? The belief seems to be that altering the look you were born with would mean you were buying into male stereotypes and fantasies and objectifying women.
I like the look of a dolled up and perhaps even modified genital region. I have thought about this a lot. Perhaps I am so indoctrinated into our culture that I like what I've been told men like. But there is also the possibility that this is just what I enjoy looking at and having. I like the look of hairless crotches, of skimpy underwear and jewelry (yes, down there).
Either way, I decided to make my private parts look a way that I find beautiful. I got a horizontal clitoral hood piercing. It doesn't make me have orgasms in public or make the area more stimulated, but it does look good to me. I bought underwear that make me look and feel sexy. I had a labia reduction surgery, though that was not purely for aesthetic reasons. I have also been getting laser hair removal. I am getting what is referred to as a Brazilian extended, meaning that they remove all the hair down there, even on the butt. I did decide to save a large "landing strip" of hair though so I can still have the choice between some hair or no hair. The best part of the permanent hair removal for me is being put on a bikini and not having to think about whether or not I remembered to shave.
All of these changes make me feel prettier even if others don't see them. And sure most of these things also appeal to my husband. I might not have made these changes (especially the permanent ones) if he didn't also enjoy them, but pleasing him was not my primary motivation and thus I see myself as a new breed of feminist.

I get to review toys!

2010-06-18T18:01:00.000-07:00

When I was a kid I remember hearing that some children were paid to try out new toys. I thought it sounded too good to be true. Now here I am, several years later, getting to do exactly that. Dear readers, I received the first toy yesterday and will be doing best my give it a thorough testing. I'll work hard so that I can have a review for you as soon as possible ;)

Sex bucket list

2010-06-16T20:27:00.000-07:00

In college I remember taking sexual purity tests and using them as a kind of checklist for future exploits (which in itself lowers one's purity score). I was at the same time ashamed and exhilarated to have one of the lowest purity score of anyone I knew. College, being the ivory tower that it is (filled with lusty young adults) made my job of crossing off new sexual experiences on my checklist rather easy.
It has been years since I last took a purity test, but every now and then I take stock of my sexual satisfaction and think of the things that I haven't done but still want to. I guess you could say I have a constantly evolving bucket list for sexual adventures.
I tend to think of my list the most when it's been awhile since I've experienced something sexually exciting or if I'm feeling more sexually frustrated. I guess that both apply currently which is why I'm writing about it now.
Other than a little girl/girl kissing I did for a photo shoot earlier this week, I really haven't done anything even the least bit sexually adventurous in a long while...perhaps a year, maybe more. Also, a couple whom my husband and I have had more than your typical friendly relationship with visited a few weeks ago and nothing happened. Grrrr. Oh well, I'm sure it will happen in the future again, but they live in Seattle so it'll probably be awhile.
So here I am, waiting for my next adventure and feeling a little like I've been marooned on a desert island.
Time to take stock of my bucket list and because I'm slightly OCD I like to have exactly 10 items on my list at any one time:
1) Use a strap-on as the giver.
2) Attend a sex party.
3) Strip at a bachelor party (kind of did this before but not in an organized manner).
4) Model for a sex photo shoot (kind of did this before too but not just photos of the act).
5) Take photographs of others having sex.
6) Play sexual games more often (I miss Truth or Dare, Spin the Bottle and I've Never)
7) Have a stripper pole in my house (it's good exercise).
8) Have an orgasm without any stimulation to my vaginal area when I'm awake (it has happened in my sleep).
9) Date another couple (for longer than a week).
10) Have sex in 10 more countries and 10 more states (see I like the number 10). Currently I think I've had sex in 6 countries and 9 states.

The Magic Wand makes me purr

2010-06-14T21:50:00.000-07:00

I like a strong vibrating sensation between my thighs. Why am I telling you this? Because I am auditioning to be a sex toy reviewer for BlissConnection.com. I started with the typical gateway vibrator. You know, the plain nondescript silicone vibrator that was enough to get the job done but not overly satisfying. I moved on to stronger vibrators like the Bullet and the Rabbit, but I ran both of those into the ground after a few years. I love long intense vibrator sessions when I'm in the mood - either during rare moments of alone time, as part of foreplay with my husband watching or as the finale after a tumble in the sheets.

Right around the time my Rabbit died, one of my friends mentioned that she had been in bed for 3 days with her new vibrator - and she had both a husband and a girlfriend at the time! Wow I thought, it must be amazing. She said that she had been unable to tear herself away from such mind blowing self pleasure.

It wasn't more than a month later that I purchased my own Hitachi Magic Wand. I opened the box to an ugly, large back massager. At least it would be easy to explain away if anyone ever found it, I thought. I quickly plugged it in and gave it a try. Then another. And another. And another. I had never experienced a vibrator so powerful, so orgasmatastic.

It quickly became part of our lovemaking ritual. "I'm feeling a little dry" I'd say. "Should I get the lube?" my husband would ask. "No. I think I'll just use the Magic Wand for a bit" I'd say. "Wanna watch." And of course he did.

Now, nearly 5 years later I still have my first indestructible vibrator and love it. It has two speeds so I can recommend it even to those who don't like as strong of vibration as I do (though you definitely do have to enjoy clitoral stimulation). The only downside is that since it is plug in only, it wouldn't work for taking on backpacking trips or to the beach. But there are other ways to have fun in those circumstances.

And I've changed the way I view it's appearance. Like all relationships not based on initial appearance, I have slowly grown fond of it's form after falling head over heals for its function. I now think of it as long white wand with a big, mushroom shaped head. Kinda like something else I enjoy.