First Time

Receiving a toy in the mail called First Time brought up mixed emotions. I kind of felt like it was wrong for a married mother of 2 to be the best candidate to try out and review a toy called "First Time."  On the other hand it brought back fun memories of going with my college roommate to get my first vibrator. Oh that feeling of youth, innocence, and naughtiness of my first (semi) reliable orgasmic aid.
I have decided to go back in time and compare the First Time Bunny Teaser, courtesy of California Exotic Novelties, to my first ever vibrator. I feel like this is more fair, than comparing with my serious power-tools of today, as the First Time appears to be a gateway toy - pink or purple, penis shaped, not extremely strong and not too big or long.
In the summer between my junior and senior years of college I was staying on campus for part of the summer with one of my best friends.  We had been suite-mates the previous year and were sharing a room over the summer.  I was horny and not dating anyone at the time, and her boyfriend who was also living on campus over the summer had been encouraging her to get a vibrator.  One afternoon we went to a nearby sex shop (being in Los Angeles, it wasn't too hard to find a place to get sex toys).
The store was a bit overwhelming for 2 college women who had never been in such a place before.  There were toys for every orifice, some as large as an arm.  There were devices for men, of which we had never conceived.  I found a plain, smooth, blue vibrator with a dial on the bottom to increase or decrease speed.  It was sufficiently lengthy and of average girth.  It reminded me of a penis, despite its blue and smooth appearance, and I felt comfortable with it.  Actually, I think I may have been excited by it.  My roommate got a pink toy that was similar except that it actually looked like a penis, with bumps and ridges in appropriate places.
We took our toys back to our room and each tried them.  I was on the top bunk and she was on the bottom.  We promised not to look at or talk to each other.  It took me about 10 or 15 minutes to orgasm. Compared to my best toys nowadays that is a long time, but it was much quicker than how long it had taken when using my hands, and about equal to using a shower.  I loved that toy - Mr. Blue or Mr. Smurf.  It was a good first.
So if I compare the First Time Bunny Teaser to Mr. Smurf, the First Time is by far better.  Granted, this is a decade later and vibrators have improved, but I am envious of the girls who buy this as their first toy.  It has nine settings which is really impressive - different speeds, pulsations, and escalations, all with the push of a button.  The pulsations and escalations are the most pleasing of any I've found since they vibrate longer and leave me more satisfied.  Also, it is pretty strong for something that runs on 2 AAA batteries (weak enough to frustrate the present me, but would have gotten me off significantly faster than Mr. Smurf).
The texture is pretty average on this toy, a silicone feel.  It has all the bumps and ridges of a penis including a well defined head.  However, it also has flowers along the shaft, which I find a bit bizarre and disturbing.  The part of the shaft used for penetration is a mere 3 inches long.  This seemed far from sufficient, though for anal penetration it might be perfect.
The bunny teaser aspect of this toy was the most disappointing to me.  This toy was made for someone who prefers the vibration on the penetrating part of the toy with minimal vibration on the clitoris.  In my ideal world, where things vibrate strongly on my clitoris, there would be a separate motor in the bunny part. As it is, if I don't use this toy for penetration I can orgasm with the head of the "penis" on my clit.  Perhaps that's fitting, since the first time I had a naked make out encounter with a real penis that is about the extent of the interaction (though orgasm was not included).

Silky smooth and she purrs

The brand new 7-Function Silicone Dream is lovely. I got a chance to try out this toy courtesy of CalExotics. It has several assets that help place it in my top 5 vibrators category. 1) It's made of a super smooth silicone that can be placed in the most sensitive areas for a long amount of time without irritation (read as half hour masturbation session with multiple orgasms and no chaffing). And to go along with it's nice tactile qualities, I find it auditorily pleasing in its quietness.  2) The 7 functions - 3 speeds, escalations and pulsations, provides me with options for varying moods as well as for my differing internal and external stimulation needs. Throughout one session I'd find myself changing between the settings, and with 7 options I was able to find the right thing for the moment, while not being overwhelmed by too many modes. 3) It's waterproof. Who doesn't love toys made for the shower. One of my favorite places to escape for some private time. And being waterproof means that it's also super easy to clean. 4) The handle on the Silicone Dream is also really easy to hold onto. This means that it works well for me to use both on my clitoris and for penetration. It has a bulbus shape at the base that provides easy and comfortable holding so my hand never got tired. 5) It has girth! And some length. This is important to me when I'm planning it use a toy for penetration. It's 6.25" x 1.75". It is also ribbed and pliable which are nice qualities, but doesn't matter too much to me. The 3 things that make it less than perfect are that it doesn't have a kill button to shut it off instantly (you do have to cycle through all the settings to shut it off). It can't be used internally and externally at the same time, and in my opinion the strongest setting could have been a little stronger. But then again, I say that about almost all vibrators.

I'm not your candles and rose petals girl

I guess I'm kinda kinky.  Not hardcore, draw blood and leave large bruises all over my body kinky, but I'm not that big on romance in the traditional sense.  It just doesn't get me all that excited.  For that matter you can leave out a lot of the foreplay and I'll be happy too.  I like situations that bring me to my edge - some mild BD/SM.   A little something to get the adrenaline pumping - spanking, hair pulling, restraints.  Now perhaps you're wondering if I'm trying out a personal ad on my blog or my new self-summary for OK Cupid.  I'm not.
This is actually to provide you with a little background for my review of the Tantric Binding Love Universal Cuffs that I have been playing with courtesy of California Exotic Novelties.  This is a romantic looking bondage device (which in my mind screams VANILLA).  It is a loop of black ace bandage type material, sewn together in the middle to create two "cuffs."  It is universal in that the cuffs can stretch enough to fit anyone's arms or legs.  This one size fits all approach may be appealing in thought, but in practice it leaves much to be desired for those who actually enjoy being bound, as it is also trivial to wiggle free.
The other unique qualities of this toy are the red satin ribbon, both tied in a bow and separately attached to a heart shaped metal ring.  While these qualities may add a sensual component, they did little for me other than get in the way.  Also, when my husband tried to create some "intimate play" using the "T-ring" as the box suggested, he simply tore the stitching.  This cute novelty is just that, fun for those aroused by the thought bondage, but not actually wanting to be tied up. For a mere $12, couples wanting a simple role playing prop or a cheap way of finding out if bondage actually excites your romantic but conventional partner, this may be just the thing for you.

Cal Exotics Sexpert

I recently got selected to be a Sexpert for California Exotic Novelties!
This is super exciting since I really love some of the Cal Exotic products that I have reviewed in the past for Bliss Connection.  I love the title sexpert and think it suits me well - I'm sexually knowledgeable and sexy.  Just the day before yesterday I was at Squaw Valley in Tahoe snowboarding and was told by ski patrol that my being there made the mountain better.  Granted I was topless and being photographed for my calendar for next year, but it was great being appreciated.
Anyhow, this is just a PSA to let you know that I'll be posting more regularly again and you can follow me on Twitter @InbedLexi or friend me on Facebook (Lexi Larkspur).

Trying on hats

I've always wished I were a dominatrix.  I think I'd love the power of ordering someone around, having him/her get satisfaction from pleasing and serving me.  I fantasize about being a dominatrix with a really hot submissive man who worships me.  I imagine having him feed me, shave me, tying him up and teasing/torturing him in some way that makes eventual the eventual climax that much better.  The power sounds delicious in theory.  I even think it'd be great to go by Mistress Lexi.  But it's just not me.
Whenever I've actually been placed in the dom role I end up worrying I'm actually hurting the guy, wishing he'd just tell me what to do or not being patient enough to tease him to the breaking point.
I'm good at being a sub though.  I've been embracing this more and more recently.  I think it took me a long time to realize that some degree of S&M are present in most relationships, inside the limits of what the individuals define as "safe, sane and consensual" (cornerstones of the practice).  Realizing that power dynamics are natural in a relationship and accepting that I'm a bottom (sub) really helped me to embrace and enjoy that role.
I used that think being a sub meant doing demeaning things.  Now I know just where to set my boundaries and discuss it beforehand with any partner.  I am finding that I happily serve and obey my master in sexual play when I'm comfortable.  In the right situation it is highly enjoyable to be tied up, blindfolded, spanked, teased, objectified or leashed.  I am happy to give up control when I'm sure that my partner won't abuse it.  In relinquishing of control and experiencing good pain, anticipation builds and I find myself aroused and satisfied.

What's sexy

I frequently wonder what makes something sexy.  I find that each of my senses has the ability to detect sexy.  And the stimuli can change depending on my mood or the environment.  When something is sexually appealing my heart flutters and my breath gets caught in my throat for a moment, sometimes I feel lightheaded and other times I just smile.
One of the more recent sexy things I encountered was a woman's skin.  This particular woman has the most amazingly soft skin - as smooth as butter or silk, with no imperfections to be found.  Is she real?  I think so. I spent a whole evening kissing her.  The crazy thing is that I was at a sex club and instead of finding men to play with (I identify as a 1 on the Kinsey Scale) I only made out with her.  But she was what appealed to my senses on that night.  Kissing her was heaven - ridiculously soft lips, great tasting and flirty.  Caressing her body and enjoying the connection was all I really wanted to do.
I had met her once before, but previously she had played more with my husband and I with her boyfriend.  I believe this is because we fell into the traditional roles of straight couples at a sex club.  But at our second encounter, her boyfriend was away for the weekend so I wasn't distracted by him.  And thank goodness.  The gentle play between our two bodies felt sweet and uncomplicated.  We were comfortable and aroused.  But since we are both straight women our sexual tension never reached the level where we wanted to devour each other with passion or wondered whether this would become something more.
I wish that I weren't so fickle when it comes to what I define as sexy.   One day someone or something can be neutral in my mind and then suddenly a switch will flip and I'll be extremely turned on by whatever my brain or body has deemed desirous.  It might be lips one day, muscles, hair, a laugh, or conversation another day.  There's definitely a pattern to what I find appealing but there are also the outliers that give me an unexpected warm and tingly feeling.  It's likely the outliers that lift my mood the most and invigorate me.  Those experiences remind me of my teenage years.  Sadly, they seem to disappear as people pair up and mate for life.  In part, my ability to act upon some of these wild and crazy passionate feelings helps keep me so happy to be in my semi-open marriage.
The only guarantee I have is that I'll experience something sensually enjoyable in every day.  And I find it pretty awesome that my senses are able to give me that much pleasure and titillation.  I just wish I knew what would delight me each time so I could seek it out.  But then I think part of the excitement is the surprise.

Friend

I saw the beautiful Je Joue Ami while shopping at Good Vibrations and could not resist taking it home with me. I have to admit that I'm a bit of an exercise fanatic and perhaps that's in part why a vaginal toning device appeals to me. Having something that encourages me to exercise my pubococcygeus muscles is good motivation to actually do the work that leads to more enjoyable sex, stronger orgasms, and decreased incontinence.
I had never heard of the company Je Joue but am now thoroughly impressed with them, based on this product and touching their others at the store. They are new to the sex toy scene, having started with their first high end vibrator in 2008. The Ami, along with their 3 other offerings are all beautifully packaged, wonderfully luxurious feeling toys made from body safe silicone and ABS plastic. They are phthalate and latex free and designed with careful precision.
I love how each of the "exercisers" is carefully crafted to make this a successful incremental exercise program. The Ami 1 (1.65 ounces, 1.5" in diameter) is a single lightweight ball. It is the largest of the three and the easiest to keep in during Kegals (or housework for a more ambitious and multi-tasking approach). The Ami 2 and 3 are double ball toners that progress in weight while decreasing in size (2.75 ounces, 1.25" in diameter and 3" long, and 3.73 ounces, 1" in diameter and 2.75" long, respectively).  The balls inside the silicone casing move slightly, making for a very mild teasing "jingling" sensation if you move around while exercising.  I do wish the movement of the balls were more intense (perhaps smaller balls to allow for more movement) as it's not actually that noticeable or arousing.
There are countless ways to use these balls.  The most basic is to just do Kegals while they are inserted.  But each one also has a cord attached for simple removal, or resistance training.  A change in position or keeping them in during your day can also increase the challenge.
With few drops of lubricant on the Ami, I find that it's both easier to put in and provides more of a workout, since it has an easier time slipping out. I personally found the Ami 1 to be too large and light to be much in the way of exercise, though it does feel pretty good inside.  I find that I prefer the Ami 2 most of the time since it's heavier, and but still somewhat girthy which is pleasurable, while remaining a challenge. The Ami 3 and I are just getting to be friends - at times I still find it frustrating (and muscularly fatiguing) to use for more than a few minutes at a time.
I recently asked my husband if he could feel the results of my 2-3 times a week of vaginal workouts.  He gave me an uncertain look and said that sex recently had felt really good.  But, whether or not he's feeling the difference, I can certainly tell that the increased intensity of my PC muscle contractions during orgasm are providing me with more pleasure.