Trying on hats

I've always wished I were a dominatrix.  I think I'd love the power of ordering someone around, having him/her get satisfaction from pleasing and serving me.  I fantasize about being a dominatrix with a really hot submissive man who worships me.  I imagine having him feed me, shave me, tying him up and teasing/torturing him in some way that makes eventual the eventual climax that much better.  The power sounds delicious in theory.  I even think it'd be great to go by Mistress Lexi.  But it's just not me.
Whenever I've actually been placed in the dom role I end up worrying I'm actually hurting the guy, wishing he'd just tell me what to do or not being patient enough to tease him to the breaking point.
I'm good at being a sub though.  I've been embracing this more and more recently.  I think it took me a long time to realize that some degree of S&M are present in most relationships, inside the limits of what the individuals define as "safe, sane and consensual" (cornerstones of the practice).  Realizing that power dynamics are natural in a relationship and accepting that I'm a bottom (sub) really helped me to embrace and enjoy that role.
I used that think being a sub meant doing demeaning things.  Now I know just where to set my boundaries and discuss it beforehand with any partner.  I am finding that I happily serve and obey my master in sexual play when I'm comfortable.  In the right situation it is highly enjoyable to be tied up, blindfolded, spanked, teased, objectified or leashed.  I am happy to give up control when I'm sure that my partner won't abuse it.  In relinquishing of control and experiencing good pain, anticipation builds and I find myself aroused and satisfied.